Just a friendly neighborhood cetacean wandering the seven seas for work and comment sections for leisure. Please direct all business inquiries to Paper Street Soap Company
To an extent, but since roster building is pretty much ingrained in our DNA it usually doesn’t pose an issue and 5 of the 6 primary dolphin religions welcome or at least tolerate casual mating.
I thank my lucky starfish every day that 1) most of my stupid exploits never saw the light of social media and 2) It’s real difficult to tell my species apart in pictures so we all have plausible deniability.
This is the behavior of literally 5% of our population (some rogue Russian bottlenose escaped the Black Sea and have been wreaking havoc ever since). Having said that murdering us en masse or putting us in captivity is about as smart as putting your hand in a blender and repeatedly pressing the puree button.
I’m the last cetacean qualified to give relationship advice on the internet but personal experience and sources tell me there are a large amount of fish in the sea.
Very insightful article, and please do not take this the wrong way but I am so glad I do not have to deal with all these things until one of those glowing things that buzzes, makes noise, and shows pictures comes out that can operate in 20-25 feet of water. Life really seems simpler in a world where if porpoises need space they can swim hundreds of miles away from each other and then link up later if they feel like it without a virtual tether.
Only caveat I would add is don’t create any unplanned new life, cause calves, while cute, tend to make a lot of noise, cost a lot of money and make life a lot more complicated. I know it seems intuitive, but sometimes we all need a reminder in a world where folks our age seem to be producing young left and right and feeling the urge to preserve their species, bloodline, etc.
The mid-atlantic dolphin community admires your decision Charlie and wants you to know we are here to provide (platonic) emotional support to all involved parties.
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To an extent, but since roster building is pretty much ingrained in our DNA it usually doesn’t pose an issue and 5 of the 6 primary dolphin religions welcome or at least tolerate casual mating.
I am impressed if a little confused at your consistent ability to find Born Again Believers in the midst of DC.
I thank my lucky starfish every day that 1) most of my stupid exploits never saw the light of social media and 2) It’s real difficult to tell my species apart in pictures so we all have plausible deniability.
This is the behavior of literally 5% of our population (some rogue Russian bottlenose escaped the Black Sea and have been wreaking havoc ever since). Having said that murdering us en masse or putting us in captivity is about as smart as putting your hand in a blender and repeatedly pressing the puree button.
Good luck with the new gig!
sunfish fillets
Spot on
I’m the last cetacean qualified to give relationship advice on the internet but personal experience and sources tell me there are a large amount of fish in the sea.
Be still my beating tailfin
Good man, got any recommendations on IFAKs?
I bet this child was breast fed til age 5
Shutting down SeaWorld
This is why I avoid land
I am terrified for your species.
You’re not wrong
on second read, this was a pretty self righteous post on my part.
Very insightful article, and please do not take this the wrong way but I am so glad I do not have to deal with all these things until one of those glowing things that buzzes, makes noise, and shows pictures comes out that can operate in 20-25 feet of water. Life really seems simpler in a world where if porpoises need space they can swim hundreds of miles away from each other and then link up later if they feel like it without a virtual tether.
Only caveat I would add is don’t create any unplanned new life, cause calves, while cute, tend to make a lot of noise, cost a lot of money and make life a lot more complicated. I know it seems intuitive, but sometimes we all need a reminder in a world where folks our age seem to be producing young left and right and feeling the urge to preserve their species, bloodline, etc.
The mid-atlantic dolphin community admires your decision Charlie and wants you to know we are here to provide (platonic) emotional support to all involved parties.
This sounds like the optimal workplace for the transient lifestyle enjoyed by most of the dolphin community