You forgot the worst part of #2: you meet a girl, things start going well, then she has a girls’ night and her friends convince her that you’re Satan incarnate even though you’ve never met any of them and she listens to them.
Brighton’s an hour from my hometown, and a perfect example of what happens when you have too many “think of the children” rich dickheads in one place.
Bay City, another Michigan town used to have an ordinance that allowed cops to subject anyone to a breathalyzer at any time, and if a minor had ANY alcohol on their breath, they could be arrested. Oh, and declining the test was automatic jail time. Luckily the first judge to sniff this in court promptly carpet-bombed it.
I love that state, but it seems to attract all sorts of shitheaded authorities.
This dude is a man-child. He hasn’t learned how to actually take care of himself yet or even be remotely responsible. And since he’s not willing to sack up for you, he’s probably not excessively interested. Ditch him and find someone who sucks less.
Welp, now we all know you’re the kind of dickhole who is attracted to people who shits upon those she considers inferior and practices a number of stupid, pretentious habits. This was quite the learning experience.
I was wondering why someone would still be hung up on their high school crush, but then I saw that thephilberg is a Buckeye, so his high school crush was more than likely his first cousin.
Find a rare pre-workout that doesn’t contain caffeine. Or the pill kind instead of straight powder, which won’t seize control of your impulses and blood pressure all at once.
Gotta ease yourself in with the pre-workout. Otherwise you go all Rage Monster from the Dude Perfect vids. Although you were probably actually fed powdered PCP and not pre-workout.
Women generally love effort-free male attention from guys who don’t totally creep them out, which is why they keep the scenario #1 sucker on the leash. It sucks, but it’s our job to be aware of this and move on instead. Don’t fall into the trap of being taken for granted.
High unemployment opens the door for this nonsense even wider. Now there’s a massive student base so utterly terrified of living in their parents’ basement forever after graduation that they’ll accept unpaid ass reamings because it vaguely sounds like work experience-type substance on a resume.
I work with assloads of old people. There are so few people my age at my workplace that having sex with one of them would turn the building into Mean Girls.
#17
Fuck you with a rusty spoon. Moved away from friends and family to live in a shithole, and after a year, I have no other options and no money with which to sustain myself if I wanted to move first and find a job later. Sometimes life just takes a giant steaming shit on your face with impunity because there’s no such thing as karma.
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You forgot the worst part of #2: you meet a girl, things start going well, then she has a girls’ night and her friends convince her that you’re Satan incarnate even though you’ve never met any of them and she listens to them.
Brighton’s an hour from my hometown, and a perfect example of what happens when you have too many “think of the children” rich dickheads in one place.
Bay City, another Michigan town used to have an ordinance that allowed cops to subject anyone to a breathalyzer at any time, and if a minor had ANY alcohol on their breath, they could be arrested. Oh, and declining the test was automatic jail time. Luckily the first judge to sniff this in court promptly carpet-bombed it.
I love that state, but it seems to attract all sorts of shitheaded authorities.
This dude is a man-child. He hasn’t learned how to actually take care of himself yet or even be remotely responsible. And since he’s not willing to sack up for you, he’s probably not excessively interested. Ditch him and find someone who sucks less.
Welp, now we all know you’re the kind of dickhole who is attracted to people who shits upon those she considers inferior and practices a number of stupid, pretentious habits. This was quite the learning experience.
I was wondering why someone would still be hung up on their high school crush, but then I saw that thephilberg is a Buckeye, so his high school crush was more than likely his first cousin.
Her name is fuckin’ Daenerys Targaryen. Her TITLE is motherfuckin’ Khaleesi. Get it goddamn right.
Just kidding. Didn’t make it past “chalk full” without throwing breakable items.
Find a rare pre-workout that doesn’t contain caffeine. Or the pill kind instead of straight powder, which won’t seize control of your impulses and blood pressure all at once.
Gotta ease yourself in with the pre-workout. Otherwise you go all Rage Monster from the Dude Perfect vids. Although you were probably actually fed powdered PCP and not pre-workout.
I was going to object because no Malory Archer for the lulz, but Lucille Bluth and Malory are the same person in every sense of the term.
Women generally love effort-free male attention from guys who don’t totally creep them out, which is why they keep the scenario #1 sucker on the leash. It sucks, but it’s our job to be aware of this and move on instead. Don’t fall into the trap of being taken for granted.
New England has too many rich fucks bumping up the median income, but un-weight that sucker and you’ll start seeing stuff pop up around here.
As a dude, exactly none of us are worth this, but it’s amusing anyway.
I’m all for splitting meals on a road trip, but I don’t find anything particularly rewarding about shitting together.
Yeah, fuck Jeter. And fuck the rest of the Yankees.
High unemployment opens the door for this nonsense even wider. Now there’s a massive student base so utterly terrified of living in their parents’ basement forever after graduation that they’ll accept unpaid ass reamings because it vaguely sounds like work experience-type substance on a resume.
yuuuuuuup.
I work with assloads of old people. There are so few people my age at my workplace that having sex with one of them would turn the building into Mean Girls.
#17
Fuck you with a rusty spoon. Moved away from friends and family to live in a shithole, and after a year, I have no other options and no money with which to sustain myself if I wanted to move first and find a job later. Sometimes life just takes a giant steaming shit on your face with impunity because there’s no such thing as karma.
Group texts to my phone that can’t handle them is giving me cancer.
“$5,000 dollar”
URGE TO KILL RISING
SUVs are pretty much the worst, so spot on with that metaphor.