It was a good day today, not once did I feel like quitting on the spot. PGP.

My girlfriend gives me a four-hour drinking limit each time I go out. PGP.

Not sure what’s harder to find, an empty, odor-free bathroom at work or a single attractive girl over 25 without major problems. PGP.

Sitting on a warm toilet at work is the same as finding out your buddy already tagged your one night stand. PGP.

Thinking your girlfriend is physically attracted to you. PGP.