Most people who claim to have celiac disease have never had it diagnosed by a doctor and are probably making it up. They’re just falling for the fad and are using the disease excuse so that they look like less of an asshole for insisting that the group’s pizza be made out of some weird custom dough.
1. Yes
2. You’re too old to have acne, so I’d say keep using it if it works.
3. Like ObamaCare, the “family plan” excuse is only valid until you turn 26.
4. Depends on the brand. Certain kinds can be left in for days at a time.
5. Yes. You should have learned this in middle school.
6. It’s a tax-deferred, defined-contribution retirement savings account where your contributions are deducted directly from your paycheck. Some employers will match your contributions. If you have one, max it out right away.
7. You stop producing eggs during menopause (usually begins in your early 50’s).
8. It’s never acceptable. You can buy high-quality used furniture off craigslist for the same price as IKEA. It will last much longer and looks much better. Only exception is a mattress. Never buy a used mattress. Ever.
9. Go to TurboTax.com and follow their instructions. Take the standard deduction.
10. When they are old enough for you to slap them without going to jail.
11. Zero percent. Food tips are for delivery and waiter service only.
12. The W-9 is for taxpayer identification purposes only and is not filed with the IRS. The W-2 is your employer-generated statement of income
13. Find the one closest to your house on your insurer’s website, pick up the phone, and call the office.
14. Increasing overseas demand (especially from Asia), OPEC price manipulation, limited supply, and taxes mostly.
15. I don’t know but if you’re asking the question, too long.
16. Probably not, but you should start finding a husband now just in case.
17. The top part of the map is north. The little lines are roads. Blue patches are water. Don’t drive into those.
18. Depends on how well you know the bride/groom. If you’re best friends, you should buy the most expensive item on the registry. If you’re casual acquaintances, the least expensive. If you’re immediate family, an item in the 75th percentile of cost. extended family, the 50th percentile of cost.
19. It’s fine on a Saturday. Not on a Sunday.
20. Since about 2007, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics.
21. The rule is one cat per resident of the house. Anything beyond that makes you a cat lady.
22. No, but heart disease medication tastes a lot worse.
23. Depends. Is your name Casey Anthony?
24. She’s better looking than you. Hot chicks become successful more easily because they are hot. Sucks, but that’s life.
25. Yes. It’s called a business partnership.
26. 6.4 miles
27. This question is unanswerable because one cannot divide by zero.
28. Unless you are a scientist, engineer, or economist, never.
29. No, it’s fine. Gluten-free is yet another in a long line of moronic health scares / diet fads that will die out in about 2-3 years. There are only a handful of people who actually have celiac disease. The rest are hypochondriacs.
30. Above 700.
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Your parents caring more about your sisters education than yours. RFM.
The womens lib movement ruined so many things that used to be great about America.
You are ridiculous. Stop being a pussy and eat normal pizza like everyone else. Your affinity for trendy diets isn’t a medical condition.
Most people who claim to have celiac disease have never had it diagnosed by a doctor and are probably making it up. They’re just falling for the fad and are using the disease excuse so that they look like less of an asshole for insisting that the group’s pizza be made out of some weird custom dough.
1. Yes
2. You’re too old to have acne, so I’d say keep using it if it works.
3. Like ObamaCare, the “family plan” excuse is only valid until you turn 26.
4. Depends on the brand. Certain kinds can be left in for days at a time.
5. Yes. You should have learned this in middle school.
6. It’s a tax-deferred, defined-contribution retirement savings account where your contributions are deducted directly from your paycheck. Some employers will match your contributions. If you have one, max it out right away.
7. You stop producing eggs during menopause (usually begins in your early 50’s).
8. It’s never acceptable. You can buy high-quality used furniture off craigslist for the same price as IKEA. It will last much longer and looks much better. Only exception is a mattress. Never buy a used mattress. Ever.
9. Go to TurboTax.com and follow their instructions. Take the standard deduction.
10. When they are old enough for you to slap them without going to jail.
11. Zero percent. Food tips are for delivery and waiter service only.
12. The W-9 is for taxpayer identification purposes only and is not filed with the IRS. The W-2 is your employer-generated statement of income
13. Find the one closest to your house on your insurer’s website, pick up the phone, and call the office.
14. Increasing overseas demand (especially from Asia), OPEC price manipulation, limited supply, and taxes mostly.
15. I don’t know but if you’re asking the question, too long.
16. Probably not, but you should start finding a husband now just in case.
17. The top part of the map is north. The little lines are roads. Blue patches are water. Don’t drive into those.
18. Depends on how well you know the bride/groom. If you’re best friends, you should buy the most expensive item on the registry. If you’re casual acquaintances, the least expensive. If you’re immediate family, an item in the 75th percentile of cost. extended family, the 50th percentile of cost.
19. It’s fine on a Saturday. Not on a Sunday.
20. Since about 2007, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics.
21. The rule is one cat per resident of the house. Anything beyond that makes you a cat lady.
22. No, but heart disease medication tastes a lot worse.
23. Depends. Is your name Casey Anthony?
24. She’s better looking than you. Hot chicks become successful more easily because they are hot. Sucks, but that’s life.
25. Yes. It’s called a business partnership.
26. 6.4 miles
27. This question is unanswerable because one cannot divide by zero.
28. Unless you are a scientist, engineer, or economist, never.
29. No, it’s fine. Gluten-free is yet another in a long line of moronic health scares / diet fads that will die out in about 2-3 years. There are only a handful of people who actually have celiac disease. The rest are hypochondriacs.
30. Above 700.