Last bachelor party I went to in New Orleans I had to pull over in Lafayette on the Sunday drive home to lay down in my truck for an hour because I could not physically sit up and drive anymore. I also couldn’t take vacation the following Monday because it was at the tail end of busy season (I no longer work in public accounting, thank God). I could barely hold a pen that Monday because I was still shaking so bad. New Orleans will test your mettle, to say the least.
Took off at noon on Friday to go to a beach cabin that my teacher friends who were on spring break rented. Severely underestimated how hard elementary/high school teachers go on spring break. Didn’t get near enough sleep. Ate nothing but pizza and ice cream yesterday to try and offset my Scaries.
I’m actually making the 5 hour drive on Saturday to go to my annual Mavs home game. Would love to help this guy out if I didn’t already have tickets. Dirk would be heartbroken by the wife’s actions as well as the guy donning his jersey. I would much rather have my parents disappointed in me than to have Dirk disappointed in me.
I don’t remember a whole lot due to going back and forth between brown-out and black-out all day. I do recall telling the captain that I’m moving to the coast and that I want to buy in and go halfsies on his charter business with him. He seemed totally into it at the time but its been a few days and he hasn’t texted me back yet.
Nice try getting people to believe you work out, Clay. You haven’t missed a happy hour in weeks, judging by your recent weight gain and puffy red eyes every morning when you walk in. Get it together, man. Everyone in the office is worried about you.
Taking a guys trip up to the deer lease this weekend to “do some work on the lease in preparation for the upcoming season” and I couldn’t be more excited.
Or you might end up blackout and wake up the next morning with an Undesirable cutting off the circulation to your arm on an air-mattress in your buddy’s living room. Life is a fickle beast…
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Last bachelor party I went to in New Orleans I had to pull over in Lafayette on the Sunday drive home to lay down in my truck for an hour because I could not physically sit up and drive anymore. I also couldn’t take vacation the following Monday because it was at the tail end of busy season (I no longer work in public accounting, thank God). I could barely hold a pen that Monday because I was still shaking so bad. New Orleans will test your mettle, to say the least.
I’m glad I wasn’t the only one scratching my head with confusion while reading this
“Adams Banks in the streets, Dean Portman in the sheets.” My God Will this is beautiful.
I’m the guy at the end of the bar 9 Millers deep with slightly glazed eyes judging the hell out of you for ordering an Ultra.
“There’s Charlie everywhere!” – what I imagine will be said after looking at your post-coitus mess tomorrow night.
You neglected to mention the part of the hungover shower where you sit down for 30-45 minutes and wallow in your own misery.
I hope you give us an update on this situation tomorrow and I hope the situation involves hand stuff.
Took off at noon on Friday to go to a beach cabin that my teacher friends who were on spring break rented. Severely underestimated how hard elementary/high school teachers go on spring break. Didn’t get near enough sleep. Ate nothing but pizza and ice cream yesterday to try and offset my Scaries.
I’m actually making the 5 hour drive on Saturday to go to my annual Mavs home game. Would love to help this guy out if I didn’t already have tickets. Dirk would be heartbroken by the wife’s actions as well as the guy donning his jersey. I would much rather have my parents disappointed in me than to have Dirk disappointed in me.
There is not a goddamn thing wrong with The Eagles, pal
Speaking of weird sex stuff, this comment currently has 69 likes.
I am about to be 27 years old.
STRONG finish with Summer Love and Promiscuous bringing up the rear.
So postgrads planning trips around spring break is a thing? How washed am I?
This deserves a Pulitzer
I don’t remember a whole lot due to going back and forth between brown-out and black-out all day. I do recall telling the captain that I’m moving to the coast and that I want to buy in and go halfsies on his charter business with him. He seemed totally into it at the time but its been a few days and he hasn’t texted me back yet.
The only things I caught were a buzz and some rays, brother.
Nice try getting people to believe you work out, Clay. You haven’t missed a happy hour in weeks, judging by your recent weight gain and puffy red eyes every morning when you walk in. Get it together, man. Everyone in the office is worried about you.
Taking a guys trip up to the deer lease this weekend to “do some work on the lease in preparation for the upcoming season” and I couldn’t be more excited.
Or you might end up blackout and wake up the next morning with an Undesirable cutting off the circulation to your arm on an air-mattress in your buddy’s living room. Life is a fickle beast…
I need to come clean. My name is Ben and I willingly purchased 3-day passes for the second weekend at ACL this year. I am 25 years old.