Sounds like a win to me. Black out, some weird sex, drunk tank, no charges, phone in tact and no missing wallet or keys. Name a better ending to that night?
First day back in the office after a week long vacation on the beach. Nothing crazy happened but I do have 200 unread emails in my inbox. I want to cry.
I actually just had this conversation with my dad. Not trying to get back with an Ex but just seeing what he thought. He goes “I never really liked her..”
This motherfucker let me date a girl for 5 years that he didn’t like. What the fuck.
This does bring up the conversation, you gotta look out for buddies tryna do this. Speak up and let em know.
It takes an insane person to “get strippers and prostitutes” with Dad and Brother around. No way they mean it.
Also, surprise the Bachelor by inviting the crew without him knowing. Ditch those planted spies and have a god damn bachelor party like you’re supposed to.
Love your dog but don’t make it an instagram. Don’t post captions from their point of view. Raising a dog is not as hard as raising a child so don’t call yourself a parent.
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Patagonia baggies are a staple of my day drinking attire. No chance of swamp ass being spotted by the opposite sex which is always a win
yikes
Getting back in the Game: Bangs the HR rep and is blackballed from dream job
*Micah executes the Skip Bayless perfectly by forgetting to switch to burner account
Sounds like a win to me. Black out, some weird sex, drunk tank, no charges, phone in tact and no missing wallet or keys. Name a better ending to that night?
12. Supertroopers: Stop: The snozeberries taste like snozeberries.
Do continue: “Hey! HEY! HEY BEAR FUCKER! DO YOU NEED ASSITANCE?!”
Me gusta Will. Me gusta.
Why am I crying in my cube right now?
Snip, snap; snip, snap; snip, snap! Do you have any idea the emotional toll 3 vasectomies has on a man?!
First day back in the office after a week long vacation on the beach. Nothing crazy happened but I do have 200 unread emails in my inbox. I want to cry.
I get that but I mean I care about what he thinks so it’d be nice if he just would’ve tossed out some vibes or something about her
I actually just had this conversation with my dad. Not trying to get back with an Ex but just seeing what he thought. He goes “I never really liked her..”
This motherfucker let me date a girl for 5 years that he didn’t like. What the fuck.
This does bring up the conversation, you gotta look out for buddies tryna do this. Speak up and let em know.
William, william, william… Yikes.
It takes an insane person to “get strippers and prostitutes” with Dad and Brother around. No way they mean it.
Also, surprise the Bachelor by inviting the crew without him knowing. Ditch those planted spies and have a god damn bachelor party like you’re supposed to.
I just realized I’ve been accidentally cultured since I started working
*Jeb Bush Voice* Please Sup
I got another “You’re great but..” texts last night so, yeah.
Love your dog but don’t make it an instagram. Don’t post captions from their point of view. Raising a dog is not as hard as raising a child so don’t call yourself a parent.
I will gladly call in to talk obscure soccer references for 2 minutes at a time
Hey.. your username, shorten it.