======= ======= ====== ====== ====== ===== ==== ====== ====== ===== ==== ======= ======= ====== ====== ====== ===== ==== ====== ====== ===== ====
For my generation, it’s tough to hear the phrase “medical drama” and not immediately think of Scrubs, a television “dramedy” of sorts that boasted an impressive cast and ran for nine years on NBC and later ABC.
Zach Braff, executive producer and star of the show, became a household name because of Scrubs and, in this interviewer’s opinion, was the only reason he was allowed to direct cult classic Garden State and other movies subsequently following that.
I sat down with Braff in an abandoned warehouse in the now gentrified and extremely hip neighborhood of Bushwick in New York City. Here’s what he had to say.
John Duda: How did Garden State come about? It’s one of those movies that people my age really connected with in high school and college, and I’m curious what your creative process was for the movie?
Zach Braff: If I’m being completely honest with you the only reason I wrote Garden State was because I wanted to have sex with Natalie Portman. She was about two years removed from a role in Star Wars: Episode 1 and those crazy hairstyles she had in that film just really made my johnson rock hard.
The goal with Garden State was to write it as quickly as possible (because I wanted to hook up STAT) and worry about any negative reviews way down the road. It turned out that I wrote an incredibly juvenile script and it resonated with high school kids. That wasn’t the goal but that’s what happened.
JD: What do you say to people who call Garden State a film for pseudo intellectuals?
ZB: I like to think of myself as the voice of the millennial generation. Outside of my main purpose of making of that movie, which was fucking Natalie Portman, I really strived to write a script that would be as melodramatic and cliche as possible.
The scene where my character stares into an empty abyss, my character being on a host of anti-depressants all of the time, and music that, during that time period, even the hippest people in this country hadn’t heard – this was all apart of a larger plan to 1. Have sex with Natalie Portman and 2. Make the most insufferable, hipster bullshit movie that I could make. And yes, I have to reiterate that I really wanted to have sex with Natalie Portman.
JD: You keep bringing up Natalie Portman so let’s just get this out of the way. It’s kind of dominating and taking away from my interview at this point. Did you guys hook up?
ZB: Yes and no. Legally speaking, I’m not allowed within 100 feet of Natalie Portman anymore. The first day on set I told her, in detail, about how I got kicked out of a cineplex in Los Angeles filled with children during the premiere of Star Wars: Episode 1. I was arrested for indecent exposure. Upon telling her this story, she nearly backed out of the role completely, but thanks to the legally binding contract she signed before starting the film I was able to keep her on set.
JD: So no. You could have just said “No, I did not hook up with Natalie Portman.” You want to elaborate at all on the indecent exposure charge?
ZB: Yeah, I whipped my johnson out in the theater and may have “buttered” my own popcorn, if you know what I mean.
JD: So first day of shooting, not so great. Was there any awkwardness between the two of you following that?
ZB: Yeah. You could say that. Anytime I had written in a scene where my character and her character were supposed to kiss, Warner Brothers would bring in a stunt double because Natalie didn’t want to anything to do with me. It probably didn’t help that each day during filming, I would put a bag of popcorn with extra “butter” [at this point Braff air quoted the word butter and began pointing towards his crotch] in her dressing room.
JD: Huh. Interesting.
ZB: Yeah, overall I’d say it was a successful shoot. Care for some popcorn?
[Braff pulled out a bag of popcorn from behind his chair with what I can only assume was topped with some Zach’s Own Dressing]
I promptly left, and it’s worth noting that I too now have a restraining order against Zach Braff.
Stay tuned next week when I interview Kevin Dillon, most notably known for his role as Johnny Drama in the hit television series Entourage. .
Image via Youtube
Respond
jduda@grandex.co
I mean, I laughed, but what the fuck, Duda?
Also, Episode II is prime Natalie Portman, especially in that torn white bodysuit.
^this guy gets it
I just got paid 9k bucks working off my laptop this month. And if you think that’s cool, my divorced friend has twin toddlers and made over 14k buck her first month. It feels so good making so much money when other people have to work for so much less. Read more this site…. www.Jobzon3.com
potentially hot take: I think that even Episode II Natalie Portman can’t touch Carrie Fisher in Return of the Jedi
Stop it
Seriously. TF did ZB ever do to you?
Before the article: “I am not going to like this”
After the article: “That was really funny. I did not like that”
Not sure what it is about these, but I enjoy them.
This was really dumb yet I enjoyed it immensely. Keep ‘em coming.
Zach Braff is the most insufferable person that’s ever been on tv and Garden state is possibly one of the worst movies of all time.
The entire cast of Friends would like a word about your first point.
Do they have beef with each other?
No my point was any one of those characters is lightyears more annoying than JD was.
Fact
Great fake interview Duda
Not your best stuff