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This past month I relocated from a drowsy bedroom town into the downtown of a city. I decided to take on this project on my own instead of paying a moving company to do the dirty work. Growing up, my family moved 15 times between the time I started elementary school and graduated from high school. I assumed this experience would give me an edge on moving myself out. This theory proved to be extremely false. It was a miserable few weeks that has left me with the following observations.
You Don’t Realize How Much Stuff You Own Until You Have to Pack
My previous digs were not big by any means. A small one bedroom with a bathroom the size of a postage stamp seems like it would be able to hold that much. It turns out that my apartment had the same properties as Mary Poppin’s carpet bag. Things just kept coming out. As I hauled one car load after another to my new place, I kept assuming I would get back and the pile would have gotten smaller. It never really did, and by the last day I just started throwing anything I don’t absolutely need into the dumpster to save my sanity.
No One Actually Wants to Help
When I announced months ago that I was making the trek to a new abode, everyone was throwing out offers to help out. Coworkers, friends, and family all said that they would contribute man power or large vehicles to aid in the process. But when it came time to do the actual labor, suddenly everyone wasn’t free a single weekend all month, or would get back to me about it later. Offering up pizza and beer to anyone that helps just doesn’t carry the weight it used to I guess.
In the end, my boyfriend was the only one who stepped up to the plate and helped. After an exhausting day of moving my mattress, couch, a vintage schoolhouse chalkboard, and a slew of odd shaped items, I realized why people didn’t want to come over. Lifting furniture is one of the worst activities in the world. I was lifting with my back instead of my legs, and my body is still in recovery mode days later. I did impress myself though. driving a U-Haul truck through city streets without hitting anything is an achievement I never thought possible for a bad driver like myself.
It Takes Weeks/Months to Fully Unpack
As I was boxing up items in my old apartment, I realized how much stuff I hadn’t even pulled out and put in the right place after moving in almost a year ago. I’ve now started back at square one with all my items neatly sitting in boxes, bins, and baskets at the new place. I’d be lucky if by fall I have everything unpacked in its place.
It’s just so easy to shove a box in a closet or under the bed when you don’t need any items out of it at the time. I’ll try to be proactive and actually organize, but when I have to choose between staring at my phone for hours or organizing a box of dish towels and serving bowls, the phone wins out almost every time.
Your Security Deposit is as Good as Gone
During the packing and moving process, I was keeping a mental checklist of things I noticed that will probably cost me a nice portion of my security deposit. Every nick in the wall, and pull in the carpet had dollar signs flashing around it. I spent almost an hour scrubbing at a stain under the sink from when a facewash bottle leaked, in the hopes it would be less noticeable. I wasn’t throwing wild parties where people tried to destroy the property, and I find I’m in a general a tidy and courteous person. But that doesn’t matter. Just existing really takes a toll on your living space, and accidents happen. At this point, I think I’ll be lucky to get back 30% of my original depost.
I’d be super curious to know if anyone’s actually ever gotten back their full security deposit. Is it humanely possible? How do you manage such a feat? Can you teach me your ways?
There’s a Weird In Between Time of Living Post-Apocalypse Style
After I got all my stuff out, I still had a few days before my lease ended and I was officially in the new place. I borrowed an air mattress from someone and decided to rough it the empty apartment. I would rotate from sitting in the one chair still left in the otherwise empty living room, and sitting on the floor. I could only eat pre-made food I can heat up in the microwave or eat cold, and slowly worked through a stash of plastic forks I took from Chipotle. The wi-fi router was gone, and the TV as moved out, so for hours I switched between one app to another on my phone. I would hang out at the mall like a sad teenager just to avoid going back to nothing.
After a terrible night’s sleep on the air mattress, I gave up on making it work. I packed up my small bag of clothes and toiletries and spent the rest of the week at my boyfriend’s place, hindering his FIFA time with my presence every day after work.
I’m glad the whole thing is finally over, and I can say with complete certainty I will not be moving again for a very long time..
Image via Trong Nguyen / Shutterstock.com
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Kell
future soccer mom of America (AKA I drive a Volvo.) Miracle is my favorite movie and it should be yours too.
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The great thing about owning a truck is automatically being seen as a mover by people you know. My favorite part is when you load up your truck with their shit and pretend like you’re gonna follow them to their new place but instead, you divert to the nearest pawn shop, sell all their garbage, take the money, and hit the casino to get free drinks and lose miserably with someone else’s hard earned cash because fuck them forever lol
I used my truck more to help people move than I ever used it for my own purposes. Best / worst 3 year lease of my life.
So I moved into a bigger apartment in same complex. 3rd floor to 3rd floor. Hired movers but felt lame about hiring movers for same complex so I put a knee brace on my knee and faked a sprain. Best $300 I’ve ever spent.
For one (VERY brief) second, I thought you spent the $300 on a knee brace.
3 time mover, 3 time keeper of a security deposit
You think your better than us Mr. Bond? We’ll see…
Hard to top you Jeff, you truly are an actor of the people
With the exception of one college apartment we totally trashed always have gotten my deposit back. Also have only had to put down a deposit on half of my apts, the other half offered no deposit specials.
I don’t mind helping friends move. I could think of a 100 better ways to spend an afternoon, but I get the customary free meal and some beers out of it and the leverage that they will help when it’s time for me to change residences. That being said, I don’t mind helping MOVE. When I get there, your shit better be packed and all we’re moving is boxes and large furnishings. If not, you are a dick. I didn’t say I would help you pack too. Moving already sucks. Don’t be that asshole that isn’t ready to get started when your friends arrive to help you.
Invest in Mr. Clean Magic Sponges. That’s how you get deposits back.
Those are just rebranded melamine sponges, buy generic and they’re barely a dollar each
Rented a house at the Jersey Shore with 10 other dudes for an entire summer. Got the entire security deposit back mine a $3.50 charge cuz we rented Top Gun on their Fios account
I’ve moved a bunch in the last few years, always by myself/with help from family/close friends/SO. But I didn’t have family around or an SO to help with the last one, and “friends” were suddenly just so busy. So I hired movers and holy crap it amazing. The company was just a few guys with a truck I found via Thumbtack, but they were awesome. I kept trying to move boxes and they kept telling me to stop. It was all so easy. Absolutely worth the price.
Moving is 100% the WORST. It’s actually top 5 on my list of “most hated things.”
Also agree with your post-apocalyptic description. I just moved states in the fall, and there was definitely a 5 day period where I ate Jersey Mike’s subs everyday because I had already packed away all my kitchen items and there was no way I was wasting money on groceries that I would just have to throw out. Related: moving is expensive.
Are you in a corporate owned place or do you know your landlord personally? In my experience, I’ve noticed when you know your landlord they tend to only deduct reasonable charges while the corporate owners fuck you every chance they get
My experience has been the exact opposite. I’ve found the local landowners want to nickel and dime everything and the big corporate landlord could care less about $200.
To be fair, my last landlord specialized in renting to college students. I’m sure he was expecting at least some wear and tear
Our corporate place just changed us $350 to replace to glass stovetop that was just wear and tear.
I told my wife next time we move we are hiring pros.