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Taylor Swift has a song called “Welcome To New York” on her album 1989. It’s a catchy tune. I bet when she wrote that song she was reminiscing about when she first bought an apartment in the city. It talks about living life in the Big Apple and how everything is possible there. It’s a song about hope and the idea that a change of scenery can really, truly change your life.
I’m not here to tell you that moving somewhere new ISN’T going to change your perspective on shit, but I am going to tell you that you’re a fool if you think every single one of your problems can be solved by packing your things into a U-Haul and moving to a sprawling metropolis.
I always laugh when people tell me that they’re moving to a different city to “start fresh.” I don’t tell them that they’re an idiot to their face, but you can be rest assured that I am thinking it. Your life cannot, and should not, be decided for you by a listicle that you read at your dead-end job called “Top Cities For Millennials To Move To.”
It must be a chip hardwired into stupid people of this earth. I don’t know if this is an inherently American thing to do or not but it sure seems like it. This belief that moving to a new city is going to give you a spiritual reawakening that you wouldn’t otherwise experience in your current climate.
This isn’t a millennial issue, either. This is an issue that has plagued stupid people for generations. They say things like “I just think [insert popular destination for twenty-somethings here] is where I really need to be right now. I just need to find myself, ya know?” And I don’t know.
I don’t understand this line of thinking. But I nod along anyways because I don’t want to tell them the truth. I don’t want to say what my brain is screaming for me to say. And what my brain is telling me to say is that no one can defeat depression, anxiety, or an existential void by moving to a new city.
That’s not how it works. Problems follow you wherever you go, and no amount of skyscrapers or gentrified neighborhoods with hip coffee shops is going to change that. I know people who go through a breakup or find themselves in a rut at work and just up and move to a new, completely random city under the guise that everything will just work itself out because they’re somewhere new.
Have I heard of people succeeding and really enjoying their new surroundings when they do up and move? Yeah, absolutely. But far too often I see people moving somewhere for the wrong reasons.
Your problems in life take time to solve. Taking shortcuts (i.e. moving to a different city) is never the answer. It’s a quick fix for something that requires much more than a new zip code. Maybe calling someone stupid for trying to rid themselves of the past is a little harsh, but I think we’re severely lacking in the “harsh truths” department these days.
Spending thousands of dollars to move somewhere new just to tell your friends that you’re moving somewhere new is not worth it. There are just so many other ways to get yourself out of a rut. Dye your hair, buy a crazy outfit, or have a stupid one night stand with someone you met at a bar.
Do anything other than try to move to New York or Los Angeles because you think that’s what you’re supposed to do. Stupid people do that. You’re not stupid, though. You’re just in a rut, and you’re going to remain in that rut whether you change locations or not..
Respond
jduda@grandex.co
Yeah, screw those people who move to trendy cities like Austin for trendy jobs like writing blogs for millennial websites or something.
Not even close to the point of this article. But don’t act like everyone here wouldn’t have jumped at the chance to do exactly what I did
Duda you are absolutely right, everyone here would kill for a job like that. I still think it sucks how all that shit went down.
Grandex needs Duda back…and we need weekend in review by Mich Ultra back as well.
If you think Duda moved here to start fresh, you weren’t paying attention.
I’m gonna side with John here. As someone who has 100% done this (to try to fix myself, to try to fix relationships), the excitement wears off after a few months and then you’re left with the same shitty, busted ass thing you had before. If you think moving to a new city will fix you or make you more interesting, you’re deadass wrong. #teamduda
He moved for a job, ya numbskull. Not for the taco trucks.
I personally would have moved for the taco trucks and then try to get a job on one of them so I could keep staying there to eat discounted tacos and maybe walk around a little bit
He was engaging in the chase, you cuck.
Chuckled a bit at this one despite it being a low-blow
Is this the start of some Duda v CallMeVictoria beef? It hasn’t even been a week since she posted her moving cities column. I’d appreciate a straight point/counterpoint showdown than this crap though.
Team CMV all the way!
I hope not. I love Duda’s articles, either because I genuinely agree with them or, more likely, am entertained by his trash take. But CMV would eat him alive. And nursejackie would help whenever she has a break from wallpapering her apartment with CMV articles.
Travel great distance in your mind….with LSD and it’s pretty cheap now especially if you buy it using Bitcoin. Guys, I’d be a multi millionaire right now if i just held onto my Bitcoins back in college instead of buying cheap thrills from drugs with them. God damnit I hate this. I could have evaporated from my life and moved to LA successfully to chase a career in being rich while not having to do anything I don’t want to do
litecoin is the future. follow that shit to the moon
(or more silk road adventures)
Ethereum and Ripple too
ETH for smart contracts and dApps, LTC for payments, XRP for the banks, and OMG for the international settlement markets. Most of the rest is just noise.
Moving to LA even though I hate the city and so does the person I’m moving for. Yes, this is the smart decision somehow.
Wow. Sad day, Chili’s Guy.
Don’t worry, I’ve got about half a year left of going to KTIH on regular basis.
They have semi-nice palm trees there, so there’s that
Just moved from LA for a fresh start
I don’t think anyone believes that simply moving will solve their problems (I’d hope). Simply, they believe that for one reason or another, the move will put them in a better position to solve XYZ.
My family members stayed in the same place their whole lives and they’re poor, therefore if I do the opposite and move around a lot, I will be rich
I said it on a CMV article and I’ll say it here…you can only fix the outside so much, before you have to fix the inside. Getting bangs, moving, losing weight all help in the short term, but long term gotta solve the problems. Therapy y’all, therapy.
Ah yes, retail therapy. Did you guys know you can buy stuff that makes you look good from MaleOutfitters.com which will help in masking your true problems as a person
Gotta fill the emptiness with something so why not some Dope Patagonia Sychilla pullovers or a Yeti tumbler to self medicate with alcohol over your crushing depression, loneliness, sense of inadequacy, or realizing your own mortality and that in the short life span that is the human experience is no where near long enough to make a lasting impact on the world and that you are really not special and will probably die alone in a retirement home being forgotten by your children. You’ll get excited for the mail call because even though you only get junk mail at least someone knows you’re alive even though its an unfeeling and uncaring direct marketing company who will wipe you off their mail list once you die and fade into obscurity and then it will be like you never existed at all so why even bother?
“You’re just in a rut, and you’re going to remain in that rut whether you change locations or not.” So true. Physically moving to a different city won’t always hit the metaphorical ‘reset’ button on your life; but then again, not much will besides time itself.
Duda, I generally agree with this article. However, if you live in a boring crappy city like; Dayton, San Antonio, Orlando, Tulsa, then I think moving to a much better city may make you a lot happier. Also, if you really like beaches or mountains and you live in OKC, then moving to San Diego or Denver may make you happier as well.
I would second this. I think there’s a difference in moving from a city with no much going on to a bigger/growing city with way more to offer.
I moved to D.C a year ago to solve others problems