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For most of us, our time during the week is spent as part of the American workforce. Unless you work from home, or you’re part of some hyper eco-friendly company that does everything digitally to reduce its footprint, there is probably a stock of office supplies available for use somewhere in the building you inhabit.
For me, all our supplies are kept in a short-term storage room two doors down from my desk. My first week with the company, I was told that I could help myself to anything I needed, and to let our secretary know to order anything that I wanted but didn’t see in stock. I had a variety of materials to choose from and it was overwhelming. My first few weeks, I would grab a single item when I absolutely needed it, and that was about it. The more comfortable I got, the more I started taking back to my desk. I’ve been at my job long enough that I have no issue carting a load of stuff back to my desk in handfuls. I’m at the point where if I see there are new colored paper clips in stock, I grab them just so no one else gets them before me.
But now, my habit has grown past taking the goods back to my desk. The office supply closet is now my personal Staples Business Center.
What started as pilfering a pen and notepad here and there has now grown way beyond. I have reams of paper, packaging tape, mini Ibuprofen packets, and a set of colored sharpies at my house all taken from my place of business. Sometimes I take things just because they look neat. I found a packet of sticky name badges that seemed like they may come in handy someday. I threw them into my purse and took them home for the day I have a dinner party and want my guests to wear name tags. I haven’t paid for any sort of “business product” in months.
Obviously, by the classical definition, what I’m doing is “stealing.” But is it really that bad? Everyone I know does it to at least some extent. I’ve always just assumed that it’s budgeted into the fiscal year that office supplies will cost more than they should because of waste/items going missing. I’m not about to ask our accounting department and implicate myself in the crime, but I’m confident they would agree with me.
As I started thinking about the ethics behind this, I decided to ask friends if they were as shifty handed as I am. Every single person I asked confessed to taking things regularly. One person I talked to even admitted to taking a printer home with them and keeping it after no one noticed it was gone. While the printer is a little over the top, the banality of the whole thing really makes it seem like it’s not such a big deal.
If you’re on the “just because everyone’s doing it, doesn’t mean it’s right” train, there are other arguments for the cause.
Like a lot of people my age, I don’t make that much money. Buying all the stuff I need for personal use on my own would really add up. I remember my parents bitching about back to school shopping when I was a kid, and I now understand. The markup on this stuff is insane. A pack of those good uniball pens is over $10, mailing labels, good folders, are all pretty pricey too. It’s not practical to buy these things on your own. Especially when businesses get bulk discounts from their supplier.
To me, I see taking some stuff you need the same way as charging your phone at work. No one gets mad when you use an outlet, even though technically you’re using the electricity you don’t pay for to charge your personal device. It’s just an understood perk of the job.
It’s possible too that it all comes full circle in the end. I let my coworkers drink iced coffee when I bring in a gallon, and everyone helps themselves to my candy dish which is expensed to my own bank account. Maybe it really is a tit for tat system after all, and I’m just taking what I deserve.
No matter what the answer is, I’m not going to stop what I’m doing. I’ve grown far too accustomed to the lifestyle. To all my fellow office supply thieves out there, I hope you feel vindicated. To those who still question the lawfulness of the issue, have fun wasting your own money buying post-it notes, and also go fuck yourself..
Respond
Kell
future soccer mom of America (AKA I drive a Volvo.) Miracle is my favorite movie and it should be yours too.
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You just go with the Costanza defense if caught.
How many office supplies are you using in your day to day life? I think I have maybe three pens in my house total. Don’t even know if we have any paper aside from the cutesy personalized stationary my wife writes the grocery list on. Stickies? Paper clips? What would I do with that shit at home?
If you were in grad school you would probably find some uses for that “shit”.
🙂
Valid.
Even though they have no idea, I’d like to thank my employer for supplying all the boxes, packaging tape, and one of those heavy duty packaging tape dispensers for my most recent move. I’m with you on this one. No shame.
A printer is ambitious to say the least. They saw an opportunity though and capitalized.
“I stole something today.”
Lie, cheat, steal, win. Repeat forever
The word of the day is “klepto”
I don’t take office supplies very often, but marketing gimmicks like a Yeti tumbler with our logo on it… I have 2
As long as it’s not anything worth more than a couple bucks, no one will care or even notice. Trust me, I do the ordering for the office.
Username checks out
Just grabbed an 8×11 envelope to ship off some tickets. Thanks, boss.
Taking office supplies is an unwritten office perk. Things that are ordered in bulk and are not inventoried are fair game to use outside of the office. The furthest I have been willing to go was to buy a printer identical to the one we are issued and acquire some printer ink and paper.
This is genius. You’re a sociopath, but a genius. Thanks for the idea.
Brilliant. I’m going to remember that one…