Ingenious Lazy Man Figures Out How To Automate Entire Life With Coding

Ingenious Lazy Man Figures Out How To Automate Entire Life With Coding

If you’re like me, nothing grinds your gears like the day-to-day administrative tasks required of your job and your life. Respond to e-mails, make your coffee, respond to e-mails, text your significant other, respond to e-mails, repeat, repeat, repeat. It’s enough to really wear on you. However, if you’re Nihad Abbasov’s genius coworker, you’ve figured out a way to automate every aspect of your life you don’t want to deal with.

From Business Insider:

The project was shared by a programmer named Nihad Abbasov, known as “Narkoz” on GitHub. It consists of a bunch of software scripts with some funny but NSFW names. Narkoz says that the scripts came from one of his coworkers who left for another company, the type of guy that “if something — anything — requires more than 90 seconds of his time, he writes a script to automate that.”

When clearing out old files from a coworker that had left the company, Abbasov realized that his former officemate had put his programming skills to good use by writing scripts to deal with literally everything that he didn’t want to take the time to do. Late to work? If he wasn’t logged onto the office servers by 8:45, his “hangover script” sent an e-mail to his boss letting him know he was “sick” and “working from home.” Reply to a concerned customer’s e-mails? That script would check for key words to recognize the customer needed help and would then automatically restore the customer’s data to his drive and send him a brief e-mail.

But it doesn’t stop there. After automating his job, our programmer started to automate his life in the most awesome ways. No more need to be bombarded with questions by your SO when you’re working late, because he had a script written to text his wife that he was working late, accompanied by a random reason from a preset list when logged onto his computer after-hours.

Probably the best though is his coffee hack: once realizing the office coffee machine was on the server, he realized he didn’t have to settle for shitty old break room coffee ever again. Not only does his coffee script begin brewing his coffee for him, but it waits the exact amount of time that it takes for him to get from his desk to the break room to pour it in his mug, ensuring that his coffee is piping hot and exactly how he likes it without any effort at all.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go enroll in a computer programming class.

[via Business Insider]

Image via Shutterstock

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Steph W.

Steph W. is a new Master's degree graduate with an intern's salary and six-figure taste. She realizes her expectations far exceed reality, so she spends her days pinning away Loubs she pretends are in her physical closet instead of her virtual one. Her hobbies include attempting to trapping her boyfriend into marriage before he finds out how insane she is and pretending that Black Box wine tastes as good as the kind she could afford when she was gainfully employed. Send her tips for getting out of student debt at

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