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One of the first lessons they teach you in grade school is that sharing is caring. I took this to heart and have adopted a very communal mindset of “whatever is mine is yours,” but more importantly, “whatever is yours is mine.” This concept is particularly apparent as I use an excess of apps and online products, none of which are registered in my name.
There are an endless number of premium services out there that require a paid subscription. I obviously want to be on all of them. The quick solution is to piggyback off someone else’s account, which I have been successfully doing for years now across the spectrum. I decided to figure out how many accounts that aren’t my own that I’ve been exploiting, and it was eye-opening.
As of right now, I am using an account that isn’t my own for Netflix, HBO, Starz, Cinemax, Amazon Prime, Hulu, Spotify Premium, Xfinity Stream, Adobe Creative Cloud, Microsoft Office, and Audible. I would like to affirm that I have offered to split costs with anyone who has been kind enough to gift me their login info. They always refuse payment and I’m not going to fight them on it.
What typically happens is I’ll informally mention that I haven’t seen The Handmaiden’s Tale or wanted to listen to the Harry Potter books and a friend, colleague, random eavesdropper, will quip in that I should just use their account to do so. Typically, after someone lets me use their account to watch, listen, create, one thing, no conversation is ever had about me not leeching on permanently.
Even when relationships end, their contributions live on forever in my computer’s saved username and password capabilities. My Xfinity account belongs to an old fling who I haven’t spoken to in years, my Audible account, a girl who was a co-worker of a friend. They easily could change the account settings and I take the lack of any adjustment as an invitation to stick around.
If for some unforeseen reason everyone I was milking from decided to cut me off, I would probably die. My morning commute playlist would be no more, I would have to go back to finding pirated software online that may or may not have five viruses attached, I would have no ability to watch shows or movies, Stranger Things starts back up this month and I wouldn’t be able to join in the conversation. Even thinking about this imaginary situation is terrifying.
While I may be labeled as a cheap millennial, too caught up in buying avocado toast to pay for my own streaming services, I think of myself as an industrialist. I’m not going to pay for something when I can have it for free. It’s simple economics. In the words of Alex Russell, “If humans actually worked together, there would only have to be one HBO GO subscription.”
I would feel a little guiltier about my scheme if it weren’t for the fact that everyone is doing it in one form or another. I have a friend who’s almost 30 years old and is still taking advantage of the fact that his parents have realized he’s still on their phone plan, and I know for a fact no one has ever paid for WinZip software after their trial has ended. How is what I’m doing any different?
I dream of the day when I am wealthy enough to pay for every subscription myself and can share it with the world. Until then though, I’m stuck frantically sending texts to my friend with the HBO account who changed his password five minutes before Game of Thrones is on. .
Respond
Kell
future soccer mom of America (AKA I drive a Volvo.) Miracle is my favorite movie and it should be yours too.
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My Mom: “Will, I’m canceling my Netflix account.”
Me: “You can’t do that because you’ll ruin the Sundays of 14 of my best friends.”
Is one of the accounts from your ex-husband?
Thought the exact same thing.
You beat me to it.
Why are you guys having a race to see who can make fun of someone’s divorce first? Seems off.
I wasn’t make fun of her, I was legit curious. As I said in the last column I have a thousand question for her. I don’t expect to her to answer them; hell I wouldn’t. But she tossed out the info that she got divorced, and it doesn’t hurt anyone to just ask.
*making, good today sucks
I’m with Will (rare) this is a weird thing to do
I deleted my ex’s profile on my netflix account. A year and a half after not hearing from her, I get texts within minutes.
Anyone else ever sabotage a shared account on purpose to make it look like account owner watches weird shit when he has his gf over?…friend’s gf: “Why is your Continue Watching section filled with porn documentaries and Roswell Alien shows, Ed?” Lol
*sigh*……Sup?
Fellow member of “using a Netflix account from an ex from years ago” nation. I keep waiting for the day the password changes but 3.5 years later the gravy trains still rolling.
This is my life. Pay for one, mooch 15. Also, I use my parents’ dish network login to live stream any sports/network stuff in real time.
My dad found out my sister shared his Netflix account with her boyfriend.. It did not go over so well
Of all the things your dad could have caught her sharing with her bf, this is far from the worst. -Father of daughters
I share account info with people. For MLBtv I charge friends $10 for the login for the entire season. They normally wouldn’t pay for the season but would like access every now and then. Win – Win
Who says socialism doesn’t work?
I’m the one family mooches off. I pay for HBO (during GoT season only), Spotify & Amazon Prime. I mooch Netflix, Hulu. I might borrow my friend’s Amazon though because he works there now & gets killer employee discounts.
But which family member gets the only other adult account in your Amazon Prime membership, since Amazon now limits Prime membership sharing to two adult accounts max?