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I’ve been getting really into garbage reality TV lately. The Bachelorette, Million Dollar Listing, Big Brother – I’m into all of it. Is it because I’ve been spending more and more time with a lady who loves these shows and has an apartment with air conditioning and no spiders? Jury’s still out. The fact is, I’m starting to see the appeal to these absolute trainwrecks of television programs more and more.
The average person (read: me) is never going to be able to relate to a real estate agent trying sell an entire floor of a building in New York City for roughly $20 million. Nor do we know how it feels to be completely cut off from society in a twisted world where a seemingly faceless entity tells you what you have to do every week (Note: Is that how Big Brother works? I’m still trying to figure that one out.)
That’s why these shows do as well as they do. We take time to admire the spectacle these humans are willing and knowingly putting on for us. Sure, some of their actions may have been staged by producers, but the rawness of the camera work is what makes it feel real and keeps us in suspense.
But the thing is, how often do you say you like something because you can relate to it? It seems like it’s all the time. “I like ____ because she’s such a relatable character.” “That song is fucking awesome, I relate to that so much.” “Ugh, I identify with that so much.” I say shit like that all the time, and honestly, I think it’s time we start seeing it reflected in our reality TV programs. Here are some ideas that I propose.
What Are We?
Synopsis: Every week, we follow a couple who has been seeing each other for a little while. The feelings between both of them are really strong, but they aren’t sure how willing they are to commit to each other. Throughout each episode, the couple is forced to ask the question, “What are we?” Love. Loss. Complacency on both ends that leads to a fruitless and short-lived relationship. Tune in Thursdays.
Just A Bunch Of Dudes
Synopsis: Meet Mason and his friends Kyle, Dan, and Tucker. They’ve known each other since college and aren’t afraid to tell it like it is…but only after a few beers at the local tavern that they go to on Fridays and not every weekday because that would be insane. With two guys engaged and two on the prowl, the weekends are bound to be full of excuses for not coming out and bottled up frustration that’s bound to result in passive aggressive group chats.
Life of Lauren (shown horizontally to read LOL)
Synopsis: Meet Lauren! She’s 26 and works in the hustling, bustling healthcare industry. Just because she works her ass off and has been promoted three times in two years doesn’t mean she doesn’t like to have fun! Come hang out with her #BrunchBitties as they journey through their twenties, looking for love, puppies, and the perfect Instagram caption.
Note: Life of Lauren would be a great crossover with Just A Bunch Of Dudes.
The Commute
Synopsis: What time do you have to get up for work in the morning? How do you get there? How long does it take to get there? How about to get home? Ride with us as we place hidden cameras in real peoples’ cars to watch them during their most vulnerable times: their commute. Tales of construction, car accidents, and careful drivers. We’ve seen it all. Get the first three episodes for free on Amazon Prime.
Food Network’s After Dark Eats
Synopsis: Just because you’re taking it easy and being health conscious during the weekdays doesn’t mean you can’t play dirty at night. Come with us as we explore your city’s after hours specials. You know what we’re talking about. It’s after midnight and you’re feeling dirty. Want to try something exotic, like those tacos down the street or the new falafel joint a few blocks away? We’ve got you covered. We’ll make it look sexy. And don’t worry, we won’t bite…hard.
I don’t know about you, but I would go in on some DVR for that lineup. It’s relatable, it’s entertaining, and if you’re a human being, you can generally predict how it’s going to end. I may be new to this reality TV thing, but I think I’m starting to get the hang of it. Perhaps I need more experience, but I think we’re off to a good start at least. Let’s see what happens. .
Life of Lauren: Loosely but not really loosely based off the hit PGP series Things Girls Do After Graduation
I would hate watch the fuck out of a TGDAG web series.
They would just throw it on loop across MMA and boxing gyms around the country.
Just a Bunch of Dudes: Loosely but not really loosely based off the hit PGP series addendum The Chronicles of Todd
More Guys being Dudes than anything
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“That doesn’t go there”
Watch as we follow around a young man who is new to the working world who begins to learn where things don’t go like parking his car downtown between weird timing rules and street cleaning times, the bigger sized paper goes in a different tray and the regular paper in the work printer, his penis in the girl he met at happy hour’s ass, the engagement ring for previous girl doesn’t go on the right hand, can’t put a baby in the dishwasher…or the washer/dryer, toilet paper on the vanity in the bathroom as opposed to the roll holder thing on the wall, the toilet seat staying up, his car into a pharmacy display window after he snaps and just wants to get high to run away from life because he doesn’t know where he himself goes in the illusion that is life lol
His body in a casket that then goes into a cemetery….because cemeteries are fucking dumb (see yesterday)
I’d bite on “Just a Bunch of Dudes” – Getting drunk while watching dudes getting drunk while the two married guys live vicariously through the single dudes on the prowl, looking for strippers, cocaine and some strange, all while pretending they enjoy their present situation and talking about the joys of marriage and family life.
Sounds like a solid watch. Or my normal weekend. Either way, I’m in.
You guy’s constant talk about cocaine makes me feel like I am missing out on something.
You are.
Second
What Are We just sounds like a complete trainwreck and I will watch every single second of it.
PS, I don’t think I’ve ever seen a person less charismatic than Cody from Big Brother.
That guy has been pissing me off. I don’t watch but people in the twitterverse keep hating Cody and every time I have to read the tweet when I see my name
I honestly quit watching that show after Derrick lapped the field and beat everyone because the contestants on that show kept getting dumber and dumber.
It’s gotten even worse because they just keep bringing returnees back, who mop the floor with the noobies. It’s still entertaining for the first half of the game when there are enough people for chaos and conflict.
I’m just bummed the hottest chicks always get evicted first.
“What are We” is a show I’d watch filled with anxiety. Bravo has this new show that films exes meeting up for one night. The first episode was a real train wreck. It’s great television.
Nothing clever to say, these just make me hate everything on tv now
omg I’d watch the shit out of “the Commute”, especially if they included people who take the trains in Chicago/DC/NYC. So. Much. Drama.
Life just isn’t complete until you spend a 1+ hour train commute in a packed car next to a dude who smells like he fucked a skunk the night before. Not that I’d know, or anything.
Congrats on finding a Partner it must be the best feeling ever. O it must be really nice to have Ac thats nice. I would love to say that i know what u mean but the reality of it is i just hope i can pay my rent and eat next week so i DONT HAVE TO BE OUT AT MIDNIGHT. Thats my reality at the moment.
I could actually see What Are We? being made into a ridiculous show on MTV.
Sounds like Just A Bunch of Dudes would be the TV version of The Guys Bein Dudes series. Would watch all of these though