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At the age of 18, I was looking for a summer job that would allow me to do two things: save enough money to buy books come fall semester, and be accepting of me showing up hungover on a semi-daily basis. When I spun the wheel and landed on working at a greenhouse, I thought to myself, “Oh, perfect, I can get fresh air while working outside all day and have a killer tan all summer to boot.” Right?
Wrong. After my first day, I had the lower back pain of a 75-year-old man and was so exhausted that even the thought of bringing a beer to my lips felt like an uphill battle. I quickly quit that job knowing that it would’ve made my summer miserable, and I don’t think the greenhouse was all that upset that my then 160-pound body wasn’t going to be lazily towing around bags of mulch all summer while simultaneously smelling like the bottom of an Early Times bottle. It was at that moment that I knew I’d have to sit in front of a computer for the rest of my life if I intended to maintain the body that carries my mediocre golf game.
Today? I find myself sitting here blogging my face off on a daily basis. I could make a case for this being the best possible job your little heart desires if sitting behind a desk is your thing. But sometimes peace of mind and a ping pong table can only go so far, and money speaks to people on a different level than it does for me. Business Insider compiled a list of the seventeen highest-paying careers to pursue if sitting behind a desk is your thing. Which, if you’re reading this, I’d have to assume sitting behind a desk is your thing, so let’s figure out what jobs you need to be applying for if you’re looking to get paid.
17. Economist
Average annual pay: $105,290
Job outlook (2014-2024): 6%
16. Software developer (systems software)
Average annual pay: $106,050
Job outlook (2014-2024): 17%
15. Judge, magistrate judge, or magistrate
Average annual pay: $106,420
Job outlook (2014-2024): -1%
14. Personal financial adviser
Average annual pay: $108,090
Job outlook (2014-2024): 30%
13. Actuary
Average annual pay: $110,090
Job outlook (2014-2024): 18%
12. Computer hardware engineer
Average annual pay: $110,650
Job outlook (2014-2024): 3%
11. Computer and information research scientist
Average annual pay: $113,190
Job outlook (2014-2024): 11%
10. Human resources manager
Average annual pay: $114,140
Job outlook (2014-2024): 9%
9. Public relations and fundraising manager
Average annual pay: $115,400
Job outlook (2014-2024): 7%
8. General or operations manager
Average annual pay: $117,200
Job outlook (2014-2024): 6%
7. Compensation and benefits manager
Average annual pay: $118,670
Job outlook (2014-2024): 6%
6. Sales manager
Average annual pay: $126,040
Job outlook (2014-2024): 5%
5. Financial manager
Average annual pay: $130,230
Job outlook (2014-2024): 7%
4. Lawyer
Average annual pay: $133,470
Job outlook (2014-2024): 6%
3. Marketing manager
Average annual pay: $137,400
Job outlook (2014-2024): 9%
2. Computer and information systems manager
Average annual pay: $136,280
Job outlook (2014-2024): 15%
1. Chief executive
Average annual pay: $180,700
Job outlook (2014-2024): 6%
See, it’s easy to sit at a desk scrolling The New York Times all day. All you have to do is become a judge, a CEO, a lawyer, or someone that knows how to code shit. That doesn’t seem so hard, does it? Oh, those things all require an average of six years of school while also burdening you with enough debt that Greece would point the finger and laugh at you? Alright, yeah, point taken.
I guess your only move is to become a remote writer for us and pray you get called up to the big leagues after you put up a few columns. Seems easy enough. .
[via Business Insider]
Image via Unsplash
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Will
Will (Twitter / Instagram) is the host of The Sunday Scaries Podcast.
@willdefries
@willdefries
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will@grandex.co
Groundbreaking journalism right here…
If all I have to do is copy/paste lists for you guys to send me money then I’m in.
What he says:
“But sometimes peace of mind and a ping pong table can only go so far, and money speaks to people on a different level than it does for me.”
What he means:
“Grandex pays shit but I get to drink at work and go to kickass events, so it’s worth it.”
Hey, I’d rather be broke and have fun at work than be broke and not have fun at work.
Personal financial adviser
Average annual pay: $108,090
Sure, unless you live in Atlanta where we have more advisers per capita than any other major city in the US. I know plenty of advisers here making $45-50k a year because supply is so high.
This isn’t the entry level pay, this is mid-career.
as a DC lobbyist I thought we could make this list
I’m surprised you could type this with so many politicians’ dicks in your mouth.
Damn, judges have -1% job outlook? Are there that many judges around that they have to boot them?
NO NEW DEMOCRAT JUDGES
– GOP