Fully Vested – I’m All In On The Vest

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There’s just something special about wearing a vest. Whether it’s in the office, at a tailgate, or just lounging around, the vest fits all needs. There are different vests for different occasions and different locations, so let’s dive in and explore which vest is right for you.

First, let’s talk #business. I humbly believe there are two types of vests that can be worn in an office: a zip up vest and a sweatervest.

I don’t know about your office, but mine ranges in temperature. Before lunch it’s 60 degrees and then I get back and it’s 98 degrees (no Nick Lachey). That’s why the zip up vest is perfect for this office setting.

If you’ve committed to a sweater vest, or even just a full sleeved sweater, you’re stuck with it…. Unless you want to risk pulling the sweater up over your head, which then pulls the shirt up underneath, revealing your lack of “abs” and ultimately messing up your hair in the process. But, if you have a zip up vest on all you need is a single downward motion and you can easily remove it.

Now, if your office is a bit more climate controlled, the sweater vest might be the right move here. I know what you’re all thinking though: “But Nick, won’t I just look like big geek if I wear a sweater vest?” Ugh…. Did I look like a big geek when I went solo to my junior year high school homecoming while wearing a sweater vest? Well… Yes, but that’s another story for another day.

You can still pull off the sweater vest look without looking like a Melvin from accounting. For a more rugged look wear a plain colored shirt underneath, and roll up the sleeves two turns. For a more Nard Dog / Cornell look toss a sport coat on over that bad boy. After all, nothing screams sommelier and croquet like a sweater vest and sport coat.

Now, let’s say we’re finally off of work. Summer’s coming to an end and the weather is getting a bit cooler. Time to go in the closet and pull out our puffy vests. Perfect for a quick walk to the store, tailgates, or hopping from bar to bar; nothing says ‘fall’ like a hoodie of your favorite team coupled with a puffy vest over top. You now have maximum maneuverability to partake in tailgating festivities such as beer pong, flip cup, or even just tossing the pig skin around, and you’re looking damn good while doing it.

Let’s toss you in that same scenario, but you’re wearing a jacket this time. You’re short arming the ball 5 yards because the sleeves are too tight. You think anyone wants to have that guy on their team? I don’t think so.

In close, vests are an excellent piece of clothing. But just like other men’s fashion standards, do not mix apparel and occasions. Because the only thing worse at a tailgate than playing catch with a guy in a tight jacket is throwing the ball to sweater vest Melvin..

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EllisND

financial analyst. bgsu grad. comedian. big gif guy.

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