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I’ve never ran a marathon, half or full, but they don’t sound too fun. Running for long stretches is by nature extremely exhausting, and if you listened to yesterday’s Touching Base you know that a marathon could sand your goddamn nipples right off your body.
Now, you may hate running, but I’ve got solid news: that distaste for running long distances doesn’t mean you have to be completely out on races.
From KSAT 12:
Charity 5K walks and runs are a popular way to raise money for a cause, but not everyone is the athletic type. If the promise of free beer and donuts is more likely to motivate your philanthropy, we have found the charity event for you. The Boerne 0.5k.
Beer? Donuts? .5k? I’m all-in. Best of all? This race is being held in Boerne, TX a.k.a. the hometown and current residence of your boy.
The May 5 event starts across from the Dodging Duck brewpub where participants will be offered a free pint of beer. It ends at another brewpub, the Cibolo Creek Brewing Company, which is also offering a free pint of beer for participants.
For those who need their math done for them, .5k is just under a third of a mile, and I can confirm that these two establishments are a hop, skip, and a jump away from each other. To all participants, I highly encourage you to stay at Cibolo Creek after your free beer; I went over the legal limit at that place just last Saturday riding the wave of their delicious beer options and damn good wings.
Not only do you get some free booze, but you also get a “pretentious oval Euro-style 0.5K sticker that you can attach to your rear windshield.” Perfect.
You might be thinking, “Hey Kyle, I’m not a New Yorker or anything, I can’t just walk 1/3 of a mile at once” and I’ve got great news for you too:
If that still seems too long to “run” all at once, don’t worry, there will be a coffee and donut station at the halfway point “for carb loading and energy.”
You’re all set. Now why might these fitness enthusiasts be holding an event like this? Oh, they’re here for the right reasons:
Milton says he was inspired to host the event after hearing about a similar one in Colorado. They decided they wanted to raise money for a charity called “Blessings in a Backpack.”
“We knew we wanted the charity to be small, local and one that focuses on kids. Blessings was a perfect fit for all of that. They are a really great organization, 100% volunteers and self-funded,” Milton said.
Pulling back the curtain a bit, the Boerne chapter of “Blessings In A Backpack” is run by my kickass mother, so I’m already extremely partial to this event.
It’s my regret to inform readers that because of the widespread popularity and attention this race has received, registration is closed, but you can still donate to Blessings via the event’s website. While you won’t be able to run in this year’s race, anyone who donates is welcome to still come to Boerne and have a beer with me at Crash Jr.’s soccer game that morning. .
[via KSAT 12]
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Kyle Bandujo
The artist formerly known as Crash Davis. My kid doesn't think I'm funny.
@kylebandujo
@bandujokyle
kyle.bandit
The perfect “Hold my beer” event
I forget what the event is called, but there’s a brewery here that sponsors a 100 yard dash and brunch buffet on the morning of the marathon. It’s awesome.
Love it. I would still be sore the next day
Boerne resident as well checking in
Figured I was one of like six 20-somethings in Boerne
I think I’m one of the six. Can’t beat the historic small town charm with the big city convenience.
Boerne forever.
I’ve organized a 5k before and it was absolute hell. Disappointed this wasn’t a known thing back then or I totally would’ve copied this idea instead.
(Un?)popular opinion: running and training for races in gradually increasing distances have done wonders for my stress levels: the feeling of small but important life goals achieved with honest effort pretty regularly, less worrying about health and weight, and most importantly, guilt free brunching every weekend after long runs.
A Detroit radio station has been hosting one of these for the last few years up here. It always attracts a decent crowd.
God Bless Texas
Did a .1k back when I was at Purdue. It was the greatest. Didn’t even have to put down my beer.