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This past weekend I received this text from my oldest friend:
Dude, NoMo hotel in SoHo. We’ve got the penthouse. Bring anyone you want after 10:30
Now, this text is unusual for a myriad of reasons. Chief among them being that he lives in San Francisco and the last time I saw him was by random chance last fall in Oslo, Norway, of all places. It was also a bit off since, well, boutique hotel penthouse on a random Friday night? Something was off so I went to his Instagram story and got to the bottom of it:
It was his squad’s fantasy draft, and they’d rented out a chic NYC hotel penthouse for it.
And I was jealous. Not because of the venue – I mean hotel penthouse is cool but, come on I have a rooftop pool in my apartment – but rather because they were doing a destination fantasy draft.
You’ve seen this all over your social media millions of times. Hundreds even. A group of fantasy footballers, usually male but that’s not a prerequisite, do some sort of Bachelor Party (Stag Party if you’re reading across the pond) style getaway with the sole purpose of conducting a fantasy football draft.
I mean, when did this become a thing? Was it the rise of popular sitcom The League doing absurd things for draft order? Was it their Vegas Draft? Did a bunch of middle aged dudes get restless with their boring ass lives and decide that since they hadn’t had a proper dude’s weekend since the Clinton administration, they’d do a long weekend away filled with booze drugs and strippers under the guise of “fantasy football draft” and then tell allll their fantasy footballer friends about it and all of a sudden fantasy football draft parties have become a multi-trillion dollar industry? I mean for fuck’s sake, I can’t even listen to the good ol’ fashioned AM/FM radio without Hooters advertising more than A Million Little Things to have a fantasy draft at a Hooters.
These drafts are getting out of control and I need it to stop mostly because I’m a jealous prick. Last summer two dudes from my fantasy league went on a road trip from Boston to Nashville for someone else’s draft; they didn’t even draft they just drove to Nashville with them and played N64 in a rented minivan for seventeen hours. You know where I drafted my team last year? No? Me neither because it was honestly so unmemorable. You know where I’m drafting this year? Nowhere, because my league folded and I’m convinced it’s hundo p because we don’t do destination drafts.
Now, I get that if you’re spread all over the country it’s a good excuse to get together and hang for a late summer weekend. My friends live within a two-mile radius of me so there’s probably a thought that there’s no need to have an excuse to all hang out for a weekend. But I disagree with all of that.
I need a weekend getaway with my buddies, no matter how close to me they live. I want to drain my funds at some extravagant resort in Costa Rica and trade first round picks for no reason other than hilarity and good times. Alas, it was never really isn’t meant to be.
We grew up. We started watching more futbol than football. Started getting way more interested in gambling our life savings each week than setting a fantasy football lineup (maybe that’s just me). Football is losing it’s luster for a lot of us, and with that, fantasy football. I’m even planning on auto-drafting the PGP league (I’ll be at Pearl Jam and besides, I have just as good a chance to win with an auto-drafted team). But yet, I’m still jealous as all hell about your destination fantasy football draft. Hell, I’d be interested in a destination draft and then deleting the league as soon as we get back home. I just want the destination draft!!
I may just have to plan a boy’s trip soon. Maybe in the spring. Fantasy Baseball draft in Iceland, perhaps. Whoever stays in the ice bath the longest gets the first overall pick. .
Image via Shutterstock
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Boston Max
Spending my retirement fund at Trader Joe's and trying to remember to check my mailbox semi-regularly
@BostonMaxG
@boston_maxg
Started watching more futbol than football? Speak for yourself, pal.
Auto draft is a trash move. No excuse for that really given the current technology
Idk why you’re getting downvoted on this, cause auto drafting is a huge joke move
Ya to me this is insanity. Maybe me and my friends are losers, but it’s nearly impossible to get everyone on the same page for an online draft via Iphone..much less at a destination.
My fantasy football leagues are a joke. Nobody commits, we have trouble collecting dues, everyone’s afraid of being trade-raped so nobody trades. It it a low-T, mediocre shit-talking, excuse of a league so we can all say we kind of stay in touch.
My fantasy hockey league on the other hand is electric. Destination drafts, no money exchanged – the winner gets pride and that’s it, huge 3-4 team deals throughout the season. Absolutely the most fun I have all year is playing fantasy hockey. I’ve tried to get my FF leagues to that level but people just don’t care enough.
This is absolutely the move. I’ll be heading out to year 4 of a destination drafting league this year and so far every single year has been a blast and it’s definitely kept me closer to a lot friends across the country than I ever would have been without it.
This seems like the best option for people who want to keep doing bachelor parties after everyone gets married.
Beats drafting from your office at 5pm to accomodate the East Coast guys in your league.
Never done a destination draft, but getting the gang back together for a drug and alcohol fueled day with football as the excuse is one of my favorite days of the year.
My friends are all brokedicks and I can’t even get them to up the league entry fee from the twenty bucks it’s been since we started it eight years ago.
Doing our fantasy draft in Nashville this weekend. I’m not not excited as hell.
Niiice I’ll be there too
Football >>>>>> futbol
I think I’m in on this. For a while I thought it was a little lame until I realized just how difficult it is to get our group of 12 people together. Great excuse for a weekend trip at the end of the summer. We started discussing next years draft at this years. Should be great.
This is a great move. Highly recommend renting a house and turning it into a golf weekend as well.
I did auto draft this year (I was too drunk to operate a computer) and it was honestly the best draft I’ve ever had. But I really just feel lucky if the group can get a solid spot at BWW, getting a hotel for a draft never even crossed my mind