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“So what do you do for fun?”
Does that sound familiar? Does it sound like a question you’ve been asked thousands of times in your life? Maybe something people say to you when conversation dries up at a networking event, or after the first drink on a first date?
It’s an innocuous question. It doesn’t make you ponder the meaning of life. It doesn’t require research or a Master’s degree. It should be easy to answer. And yet, it isn’t. At least not for me. Every time someone asks me this question, I freeze up. I get anxious. I don’t know what to say. Every time, all I can think is, “do people really have hobbies?”
Like, real hobbies? Are people out here, just pursuing their passions in their free time? How? Why? And most importantly, what are they? Whenever I’m asked about my hobbies, my mind goes blank, because deep down, I know I don’t have any. I mean, sure, I have stuff that I do outside of work. I go to the gym. I play rec sports. I drink, in various locations. I watch Netflix for hours. I…yeah. That’s pretty much it. Do those count as hobbies? Because they sure don’t seem to.
In my mind, a hobby is something that you’re passionate about, that you pursue outside of work on a regular basis. And – this is the hard part – it betters you as a person. Right? Because otherwise, anything could be a hobby. I do my laundry regularly, but that’s not my hobby. Mainly because I hate it, but also because it doesn’t add value to my life (outside of clean clothes). What about going to the gym? Is my hobby working out? Does it have to be bigger than that? Fitness? Is that it? Is that my hobby? I fucking hope not, that sounds lame as hell.
If you claim “fitness” as your hobby, I’m sorry to tell you, but you’re a fucking nerd. I know, I know. You thought that by getting swole and telling everyone about your “Crossfit PR,” you had society fooled. But you don’t. You’re still a nerd, you’re just a fit nerd. People whose main hobby is working out are just using it to fill a hole in their lives. Yeah, I’m talking to you, people at XSport Fitness at 11pm on a Saturday. We all know that if you had anything better to do you wouldn’t be grunting out deadlifts in a desolate weight room while everyone else is headed to the bars.
Which brings me to my last activity. Drinking. Is…is that my hobby? I mean, I do it regularly (more often than my parents would like, that’s for sure). I do it in a lot of different places (my apartment, the bar next to my apartment, the target next to my apartment, the alley behind my apartment), and I undoubtedly enjoy it. But is it a hobby? I don’t think so. It definitely doesn’t better me, and because of that, I wouldn’t be able to use it as an answer to that all-too-common question.
“What do you do for fun?” Oh, I get drunk, fellow coworker. That’s what I do for fun. That’s also what you do for fun. Hell, that’s what everyone does for fun. No one has real hobbies. Do you expect me to believe there are people out there that get home from work and immediately head out to the garage to work on an old ’69 Challenger they’ve been painstakingly restoring for nine years? Or that they meticulously craft ships in bottles, spending months on each project before carefully placing it upon a shelf in their study that holds dozens of bottled ships?
Get the fuck out of here. This is real life, not a movie. People don’t meet up with their friends every morning before work and play bridge, they don’t spend their Saturdays gardening, and they sure as shit don’t settle down with a good book to read every evening. I refuse to believe it.
And yet, every time our “hobbies” are questioned, we all feel the need to lie. To pretend we have full, enriching lives. To pretend we don’t all go home, toss a frozen pizza in the oven and put a movie we’ve seen a hundred times on the TV, only to ignore it and browse Twitter on our phones. We say things like “I have a book club on Thursdays,” which means “I drink with my girlfriends’ on the one Thursday a month we all have free.” We say “I like to spend my free time in nature,” which means “I spent two grand at REI and bought a bunch of camping equipment that collects dust in my basement while I limit my outdoor time to walking down the street to pick up my Chinese food instead of having it delivered.”
Hell, I do it too. Whenever I’m asked about my hobbies, I spout off some gibberish about “Spending time with friends, playing sports, and traveling.” Traveling? Can you believe that? Do you know how fucking rich you have to be to count traveling as your hobby? And I say that, out loud, to people. And they humor me, because they know they’re lying about “volunteering in food kitchens.” It’s a cycle of lying and embellishing, and I, for one, am sick of it.
The next time someone asks me what my hobbies are, I’m going to give it to them straight. I have none. I’m 26-years-old, and I spend most of my free time at the gym, the bar or the couch. I’m not ashamed. And neither should you be..
Respond
Nick Arcadia
The opposite of a life coach. Email or DM me if you want some bad advice: nickarcadiapgp@gmail.com
@noampao
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People that ask that question are just waiting for their turn to tell you what premeditated answer they have come up with.
That’s one of the most annoying things ever. When you can clearly tell someone isn’t listening to you but only waiting for their turn to talk.
My hobbies include being shitty at golf, watching sports, being shitty at fantasy football, memes, and drinking outside.
I don’t have hobbies. I do have a handful of addictions, however
I’m probably not alone in this, but since college football season is here and I live in Austin, all of my Saturday hobbies until January are basically watching college football at the bars downtown or tailgating for UT home games, and yes these involve drinking. Here’s the typical schedule:
9-11: Watch College Gameday / drink coffee to prep for the long day ahead
11-12: Make moves to the bars downtown to watch games or head to the tailgates if UT has a home game. Drink #1 is consumed right at noon to kick things off.
12-6: Watch football (at Little Woodrows for the Austin PGPers) or still tailgating and then head to the UT game. A few drinks are consumed during these games/tailgates
6-7: Eat something so I don’t die. (almost always One Taco at Little Woodrows). Continue watching football
7-8: Have the debate with my friends as to whether we’re staying out to watch more football or calling it an early night. It always ends with us staying out. Red Bull Vodka #1 is consumed to stay awake for the night games
8-11: Continue watching football. Realize one Red Bull Vodka isn’t cutting it, so order another one or two.
11-12: Football is winding down, but we’re winding up due to all the Red Bulls. The decision is made to keep the party going
12-2: One of the friends always wants to go to the bars on Dirty 6th Steven though I’ve told myself numerous times I’ll never go there again. The squad heads to Dirty 6th.
2: Uber home
Sunday 6 am: Wake up early AF due to all the Red Bulls from the night prior, look at all the Apple Wallet notifications on my phone from all the bars finally closing my tabs i left open, Sunday Scaries begin, throw on Will’s podcast to ease the pain.
Repeat next Saturday
One. More. Day……
Ehhhhh Hawaii at Colorado State doesn’t really, ya know, tickle my testes in a satisfying manner. Football starts labor day weekend.
Hey now, football is football. Go fucking Rams.
What movies are you watching where people meet up with their friends before work and play bridge?
I understand that this article is somewhat tongue in cheek, but yes people do have hobbies. It’s not always something as basic as hiking or traveling, or as contrived as a book club, but anything you do that isn’t related to work can be considered a hobby. Granted, some hobbies are more fulfilling than others, but playing rec sports and watching sports are definitely hobbies. Especially when you think about how much of your free time they take up.
Hey it’s Friday, relax
No hobbies allowed on a Friday?
I race my car at autocross around once a month on Sundays. It’s a fun to drive at your car’s maximum potential, plus I enjoy researching new parts and techniques I can use to go faster. I feel like I’m actually using my engineering degree for something other than writing SQL reports.
I do a good amount of woodworking as well. I’ve made cornhole sets, speakers, a coffee table, and some model boats. It usually ends up being cheaper and better quality than you can buy in the store.
What does your woodworking set up look like? What would be a good introductory route? I’ve been interested in this but don’t really have the space (in an apartment) or the knowledge.
Check out your city for a shop. A lot of times you can find one that some retired guy runs and will teach you some tricks. A local community college is a good place to start too. You might be able to find a trade class that would work as an introduction.
That’s a good idea with the community college. I’ll have to look into it.
My parents and grand parents both moved right around when I was moving into my first apartment, and as a result I ended up with a ton of tools that take up a bunch of space. I usually setup a folding table in my driveway for the day if I’m working on a big project.
I would recommend checking out a maker space. They’re usually around $50/month for members or $10/day one day a week for non-members. You get access to top of the line tools including some that are normally out of reach to hobbyists, like laves, 3D printers, laser engravers, etc.
You can also find anything on YouTube/Internet, the biggest hurdle is just finding the courage to dive into unchartered waters. I started down this route with car maintenance right out of undergrad because I was poor and didn’t want to pay people to work on my car. It started with small things like oil changes and spark plugs and eventually I worked my way up to more complex things like suspension parts and minor engine work. I recently bought a house and plan to go down this route again with renovation projects.
I like running. Most people don’t but I do, and I run a couple marathons a year. I met my girlfriend through running. I know it falls into your fitness category but it’s a hobby.
I play guitar alone at home semi regularly. Hobby. Just things you do in your free time.
Sure! People have other hobbies, they just drink during them (i.e. painting, hiking, traveling, softball/volleyball leagues, trivia, etc.).
who in their right mind wants to drink while hiking?
I like to bring one beer to enjoy when i get to the top.
#SummitBeers are great
This I can see
The first beer AFTER the hike is the best tasting
You’ve clearly never hiked properly before. Beers and/or spliffs is a MUST
I have way too many friends out west who’ll finish 5 out the 6 on the way up, but leave that last precious beer for the peak and tent set-up. I guess I don’t see it any different than drinking while playing volleyball/softball/tailgate 2-hand.
Too legit. But luckily most people are too busy waiting to tell you about their exciting life to listen