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Starbucks is doing everything in their damn power to stay on top of the coffee game. Between serving alcohol and updating their employee dress code, they’re clearly trying to get a grip on everyday ‘millennial’ rather than be your mom and dad’s coffee shop that just serves black, burned bean water.
Last week, they revealed a new drink creation called The Espresso Cloud IPA created by “coffee master” Justin Burns-Beach. I don’t know what a “coffee master” is but it appears that it’s a dude that sits in an exploratory Starbucks kitchen all day experimenting with espresso. Starbucks made a video explaining the concept as if it’s a new iPhone coming out.
There are two schools of thought here. The first is that this resembles a concoction that I used to drink while listening to Mac Miller’s “Donald Trump” at 11 a.m. before football games. But Four Loko has since been banned in that form because people were having heart attacks and stuff. And call me crazy, but this sounds even more aggressive.
The second school of thought is that this might be one of the worst ideas ever. Without going into too much detail, I can tell you one thing that espresso and IPAs both have in common: they often end with a ten-minute business meeting with the drinker and the bathroom. If you even entertain the thought of having more than one, you better have a fully charged laptop in the morning for when you’re working from home. You know what I’m sayin’, Campbell? .
[via Extra Crispy]
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Will
Will (Twitter / Instagram) is the host of The Sunday Scaries Podcast.
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Seems like we should all rip one of these in memory of Johnny D and Brian.
So is this indicative of any sort of larger strategy for PGP?
It is not indicative of any strategy.
Thanks for clearing that up, chief
Johnny D’s new lifestyle combines depression with unemployment
…and putt putt golf if you saw his snapchat story. That’s a very bad mix.
At least a real round of golf will offer you the tranquil lanscape of rolling hills and fall’s finest foliage as a backdrop to your mind’s existential contemplation- Mini golf? whiny brats who cheat at mini golf. I hate cheaters. A 7 is a 7, not a par..
Your profile picture looks like you pissed your pants.
One picture is not indicative of any sort of….
Would.
About to go try one. Might crap pants. I’ll let you know.
Give us a forum
Here’s a transcript of the statement for those who don’t listen to the podcast:
DAVE: Ya, you wanna… take care of this before?
WILL: Ya…take care of it Dave.
DAVE: Ya no..ok…uh…This is for the …um… loyal readers..uh…we’ve…uh addressed it a little bit on the site…uhh..in some of the comments but…um…you may have notice some changes in the staff…um around here at Grandex…um…so some of the people you may be used to…um…hearing on the podcasts occasionally…um…aren’t gonna be here anymore…um…were not gonna really dwell or get into it too much but that’s just where were at right now…um…I thought it would be…I thought it would not be a good thing just to…just to gloss over it like it never happened I thought we needed to…
WILL: Ya we needed to…we see all the comments…
DAVE: …address it. There no…there’s no not awkward way to address it…
WILL: …ya so I mean its just a change in strategy
DAVE: …ya
DILLON: …we wish those guys well
DAVE: They’re all going to do…they are going to be fine. We love y’all thank you…its actually a positive that y’all are like commenting or that y’all are wanting to know what is happening because…it means you care…you want to know…you’re invested in these sites too…you like to see uh…you like to see good content and see us do well…and we appreciate that…we appreciate all the listens and all the reads.
They redeemed themselves by talking about hunting… but it wasn’t any more articulate than the above. How do people listen to the pod cast will all the Um, Uh, Ah, Like, Ya, and You Knows?
I honestly never realized it until actually seeing it written down
If you don’t notice it, your oratory skills need some work. It takes a conscious effort every time you speak to work the filler out of your speech, but you come across infinitely smarter.
My school had a required public speaking class where we had to record ourselves, go back and watch our speeches, and write out a transcript of what we actually said versus what we wrote on the original speech. It’s quite eye opening.
To answer your question, I never notice all the um, uh etc because listening to the podcast (and in my opinion most good podcasts) feels like a hang with your friends rather than a formal thing.
It appears Grandex is going with the absolute bare minimum with these sites (including tfm/tsm) to keep a built in audience for man outfitters, RG, etc. We’ll see if or how bad the quality of articles drops from having remote writers and the few in house pushing out articles as fast as they can. They just don’t want to say the original 3 sites are cheap advertising/they are almost handcuffed to them and have to keep them around as supporting roles to the merchandising site. Rayne touched on this when he went on dudes doing biz when he said the difference between man outfitters and RG compared to any other newer southern-fratesque clothing company (southern proper, southern gentlemen, literally any clothing company that started since 2012 with the word “southern” in it) is that they have built in companies from tfm, PGP and tsm.
I have been reading PGP for probably 3 years. I’ve seen the rise and fall of Brian and now the rise and fall of Duda.
This really sucks and it just goes to show grandex has sold out much like we all thought they would. In search of $ they forget about the readers that put them on the map.
This is the last article I’ll read by any grandex employee. It was fun while it lasted. Good riddance.
DPT
Seems like an aggressive overreaction. It made close to zero financial sense for them to keep any, let alone so many, full-time, in-house writers on the payroll. It sucks but it’s better for everyone in the long run. The writers really had no career ladder within Grandex, which was never much more than a resume booster for recent graduate aspiring writers in the first place.
And who knows? Maybe we’ll still get the occasional remote article from the old guys.
I really think that if they’re going to do remote writers only that they need to introduce a tiered system for writing. Either the value of an article to them is really around that $25 mark, or they don’t actually know what the values that allow you to reach this conclusion are (revenue generated for external advertisers vs internal advertisers, % of returning visitors that go on to buy products, most popular articles for backlinking and long-tail…).
There needs to be something that prioritizes moving and retaining good writers along to making something decent ($35, $45 an article? I admit I don’t know going rates, so I’m trying to figure out what would be a decent freelance hourly rate assuming a good article takes about 2 hours to write) while also being profitable.
You act like I give a shit about what makes financial sense. Grandex sold out for more $. Plain and simple.
I’m arguing that content will suffer therefore I won’t read anymore. I work in a field where employers don’t dump employees once the next big thing comes up.
I get that there is no such thing as emotion in business, but don’t lecture me about making a decision to not read anymore. That’s mine and I don’t think it’s an overreaction.
DPTpostgrad
What field is that? Just curious..
Nah, it’s an overreaction.
Yeah. What kind of shit company makes tough, but smart, decisions to be more profitable and successful?
Yeah. What kind of nitwit chastises someone on a comedy site for not wanting to read said site anymore?
I don’t blame them for it. But I’m entitled to an opinion much like you are, chief.
But what if your opinion is wrong?
This… was a normal article that they would’ve written today or 3 years ago. I don’t get how this was the straw that broke the camel’s back.
Reminds me way to much of a “bomb” style drink. Always leads to bad decisions.
Solid Pierce Bush reference