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A couple of extremely stupid dumbasses are currently being sought by police after setting an Arizona Wal-Mart’s firework display ablaze in what has to be the shittiest, least funny prank of the year.
Phoenix police are actively hunting the arson culprits, who can probably be heard somewhere around Tempe shouting “World Star! World Staaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaar!”
From KABC:
An Arizona Walmart was evacuated after a fireworks display erupted in a store aisle.
Phoenix fire officials say someone set the fireworks display off inside the business, causing the sprinklers to go off, according to KNXV.
Officials say this could have quickly turned into an extremely dangerous situation.
“Somebody could have been killed inside that store with that fire growing as fast as it did and as bad as it could have gotten,” said Capt. Larry Subervi with the Phoenix Fire Department.
Some customers initially complained about smoke inhalation but all were treated at the scene. They’re expected to be OK.
Authorities say they are looking for two suspects in this case. Fire officials released security footage of the culprits, who could face up to 20 years in prison.
And here is video of the stunt, which was clearly a bad idea from the start.
I would love to hear the pro and con conversation these two idiots had before lighting up the local Wal-Mart and ruining everybody’s 4th of July fireworks plans.
“Pro: We’ll make the news and maybe go viral.
Con: We might kill someone and go to jail for 15-20 years.
OK, these are pretty much even. Should we just flip a coin?”
Customers complained about smoke inhalation and initially thought the loud bangs were gunshots, because of course your initial reaction is to believe nobody in their right mind would be setting off an entire fireworks display indoors with dozens of innocent people shopping all around you. They also set off store sprinklers and probably ruined a ton of merchandise.
Here is to hoping these lunatics spend at least 20 years in prison, potentially longer. This is way worse than a stupid stunt a kid pulls — this is essentially arson. Their best chance at escaping prison might be to run to Mexico and live the rest of their lives selling street ornaments in Tijuana. Not a bad life plan, to be honest.
But hey, at least they went viral. .
[via ABC 7]
Here’s where you can separate your audience based upon their maturity. Most of the readers have full time jobs and are sitting here thinking wow that was a pretty horrific dumb thing to do. Then there’s people like me who also work themselves into the grave but read this and thought “hahaha that’s pretty funny, the 4th is almost here I should probably start stocking up on some fireworks soon”.
This is what happens when you don’t vaccinate your kids. They burn down Wal-Mart.
probably less of a prank and more full blown vandalism.
118 degrees in June will make people do crazy things.
That is un-fucking-inhabitable. And these people say living in the cold is crazy…
Had to get out. It’s overwhelming for 7 months