Columns

Military Dudes Are The Coolest Dudes

TOM+CRUISE+TOP+GUN+1980S

Growing up in a military household, I developed a love for men in uniform. In honor of Independence Day and those who fight to keep it that way, here are just a few of the reasons military dudes are the coolest of all dudes. I’m not forgetting that there are plenty of women who fill this much-appreciated capacity, too, and I’m sure those ladies are sexy as hell in their uniforms, but I’m sure they’d rather have a guy tell them that.

Uniforms

When my dad retired from the military, my mom told him he had to keep one of his flight suits. I in no way want to know what for, but after carousing a slew of flight suit-wearing gentlemen on the Army base one day, I have a pretty good idea. There’s something about a man in uniform that drives women crazy. Uniforms can make even the most average of asses look like something worthy of a little pat, and heaven help us if they’re in dress blues.

Military Base Perks

You know why you should date a military man, besides the whole selfless, patriotic warrior thing? He has access to discount designer wear and everything else nice on the base. For your birthday, he can make you a Gucci sunglass-wearing, Michael Kors bag-carrying, Ralph Lauren-wearing princess for a fraction of the civilian cost. Oh, and that case of wine he just brought over? Same thing. Ahh, the benefits of fighting for your country, or making someone who does very happy!

The Positive Side Of Absenteeism

They say absence makes the heart grow fonder, and I’m inclined to believe that. I’ve heard stories of military men coming off of the flight line to their eagerly awaiting lady friends and barely making it past the bushes next to the hangar before clothes started coming off. What girl doesn’t want that kind of excitement and anticipation in her life? I know it’s hard for them to be away and for you to have to be a nervous wreck about their safety the entire time, but you get the satisfaction of knowing your man is out there for a cause, and one of the greatest ones of all I might add: America.

I could go on, but I’m as anxious to begin my weekend as everyone else. So, as we gallivant out on our holiday weekend festivities, let’s take a minute to think about the dedicated men and women who are the reason for our three-day weekend this year. Grab a beer, grab one for your closest armed services buddy, and pour a little out for these guys. They deserve it.

Email this to a friend

McMagistrate

After stretching college out for 9 years, McMagistrate is now an attorney in her late-ish 20's who earned her title by embracing the stigma that accompanies a healthy partying habit. She enjoys showing off her sub-par golf game and pretending her impressive law school loan doesn't exist. You can likely find her on her patio, live-tweeting her wine binges, and concerning her neighbors.

2 Comments You must log in to comment, or create an account
Show Comments

For More Photos and Content

Latest podcasts

Download Our App

Take PGP with you. Get

New Stories

Load More