I believe I can speak for all of us on this site and say that Will has opened our eyes and shined the light on the feeling of loneliness, anxiety, and overall unease we feel on Sunday evenings prior to the start of a new work week. I am of course referencing what is now commonly known to the world as the “Sunday Scaries.”
This all encompassing feeling of dread and worry has long been thought to be inevitable, and much like the terrible hangover you woke up with Sunday morning, passing the time minute by minute, is the only option. That was the case until now. I believe I have found the cure to the “Sunday Scaries” in a routine and ritual that I first experienced in the early days of dating my wife and have adopted and adapted for the Postgrad individual.
Back in those days, my wife and I were still getting to know each other’s families, and as such, invitations over to her parents’ house were beginning to become more common. Barbecues, pool days, and football afternoons were the norm – certainly things I was accustomed to. But when I first received an invitation to Martini Sunday, things changed forever.
Martini Sunday, as first defined by my now in-laws, consists of the family coming together, typically around 6:30 p.m. Sunday evening, for appetizers and cocktails, light background music, and relaxed conversation. The lights are dimmed down as everyone casually sips their handmade and weekly varying martinis – everyone is at ease, and all your concerns seem to slip away as the moment around you is quite perfect. Any thoughts of worry and anxiety about what lies ahead can be temporarily pushed to the way side knowing you are enjoying a delicious cocktail with people you care about and who care about you.
Following the 2nd round of cocktails, the evening naturally evolves into a quiet and delicious homemade dinner (or takeout) and maybe a glass of red wine or two. As the conversations about everyone’s weekend and upcoming work/school week naturally wind down, everyone says their goodbyes and goodnights and settles in for some shut eye. At least that was how the in-laws typically did it.
I acknowledge that not every postgrad lives in the same city or state as their parents or loved ones. Not all of us have a girlfriend, boyfriend, or significant other. That is okay. Martini Sunday is not about who you are with – it is more about embracing a connection with someone who, most likely, is going through the same slippery slope of negative emotions you are. Invite a friend over, maybe text a little lady or fella from one of those dating apps and see if they would be down, or even hop on Skype or FaceTime with someone you haven’t caught up with in a while. You know they are free – no one makes plans for Sunday evenings. Shake up a few rounds of cosmos or lemon drops and let the conversations flow. Even now, my wife’s parents are out of state and we still have FaceTime Martini Sunday once a month with them.
Knowing that you have some kind of upcoming social event Sunday evening will encourage you to be (semi) productive during the day. You need to get to the grocery store to buy fresh ingredients for that Pineapple Basil Martini you can’t wait to try, so might as well stock up on healthy ingredients for the rest of the week. Maybe you are expecting your girlfriend or a new date to come over and want to spruce up the ol’ apartment for a change ahead of time. Why not knock it out and get the place somewhat tidy prior to the week? By the time you settle in for that first martini, you’ll feel a little better about your day knowing that you got a few things accomplished.
The point is Martini Sunday gives you something to look forward to on a Sunday as opposed to the typical dread that comes with knowing your weekend fun is over. It is not about ripping shots and staying out past midnight. It’s about getting together with people you care about and enjoying some good company and unique drinks.
Naturally, my wife and I have carried on this tradition over the past several years, and it has become one of the most enjoyable parts of our weekend. We’ve tried out number of varieties ranging from cucumber blueberry martinis to Manhattans, and each time we seem to enjoy the evening just as much. Toss some frozen appetizers from Trader Joe’s in the oven while you’re shaking up some toddies and in no time you’ll have a full spread in front of you.
Martini Sunday is a way to disconnect from the hustle and bustle of the modern world and really experience and appreciate the moment with those around you. No phones, TV, or stress – just you and another person, trying to make the most of a Sunday night together. So give it a try. Set up a time with a friend, gf/bf, or parent(s), and I guarantee you won’t regret it. Maybe you’ll even have a new Sunday night tradition to help ease yourself into the week.
I’d stick to 2 martinis max though – they can sneak up on you and no one wants to start out Monday morning with a hangover..
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