I’ve been getting really into garbage reality TV lately. The Bachelorette, Million Dollar Listing, Big Brother – I’m into all of it. Is it because I’ve been spending more and more time with a lady who loves these shows and has an apartment with air conditioning and no spiders? Jury’s still out. The fact is, I’m starting to see the appeal to these absolute trainwrecks of television programs more and more.
The average person (read: me) is never going to be able to relate to a real estate agent trying sell an entire floor of a building in New York City for roughly $20 million. Nor do we know how it feels to be completely cut off from society in a twisted world where a seemingly faceless entity tells you what you have to do every week (Note: Is that how Big Brother works? I’m still trying to figure that one out.)
That’s why these shows do as well as they do. We take time to admire the spectacle these humans are willing and knowingly putting on for us. Sure, some of their actions may have been staged by producers, but the rawness of the camera work is what makes it feel real and keeps us in suspense.
But the thing is, how often do you say you like something because you can relate to it? It seems like it’s all the time. “I like ____ because she’s such a relatable character.” “That song is fucking awesome, I relate to that so much.” “Ugh, I identify with that so much.” I say shit like that all the time, and honestly, I think it’s time we start seeing it reflected in our reality TV programs. Here are some ideas that I propose.
What Are We?
Synopsis: Every week, we follow a couple who has been seeing each other for a little while. The feelings between both of them are really strong, but they aren’t sure how willing they are to commit to each other. Throughout each episode, the couple is forced to ask the question, “What are we?” Love. Loss. Complacency on both ends that leads to a fruitless and short-lived relationship. Tune in Thursdays.
Just A Bunch Of Dudes
Synopsis: Meet Mason and his friends Kyle, Dan, and Tucker. They’ve known each other since college and aren’t afraid to tell it like it is…but only after a few beers at the local tavern that they go to on Fridays and not every weekday because that would be insane. With two guys engaged and two on the prowl, the weekends are bound to be full of excuses for not coming out and bottled up frustration that’s bound to result in passive aggressive group chats.
Life of Lauren (shown horizontally to read LOL)
Synopsis: Meet Lauren! She’s 26 and works in the hustling, bustling healthcare industry. Just because she works her ass off and has been promoted three times in two years doesn’t mean she doesn’t like to have fun! Come hang out with her #BrunchBitties as they journey through their twenties, looking for love, puppies, and the perfect Instagram caption.
Note: Life of Lauren would be a great crossover with Just A Bunch Of Dudes.
Synopsis: What time do you have to get up for work in the morning? How do you get there? How long does it take to get there? How about to get home? Ride with us as we place hidden cameras in real peoples’ cars to watch them during their most vulnerable times: their commute. Tales of construction, car accidents, and careful drivers. We’ve seen it all. Get the first three episodes for free on Amazon Prime.
Food Network’s After Dark Eats
Synopsis: Just because you’re taking it easy and being health conscious during the weekdays doesn’t mean you can’t play dirty at night. Come with us as we explore your city’s after hours specials. You know what we’re talking about. It’s after midnight and you’re feeling dirty. Want to try something exotic, like those tacos down the street or the new falafel joint a few blocks away? We’ve got you covered. We’ll make it look sexy. And don’t worry, we won’t bite…hard.
I don’t know about you, but I would go in on some DVR for that lineup. It’s relatable, it’s entertaining, and if you’re a human being, you can generally predict how it’s going to end. I may be new to this reality TV thing, but I think I’m starting to get the hang of it. Perhaps I need more experience, but I think we’re off to a good start at least. Let’s see what happens. .