Something tells me that this isn’t a limited-time promotional flavor: A Dunkin’ Donuts employee at a location in northern Virginia allegedly sprayed donuts with a cleaning solution that contained bleach before serving them to a group of teenagers.
Police were called to the Dunkin’ Donuts location in Fairfax County and determined that the group of teenagers were indeed poisoned by donuts.
This sounds awfully familiar…
“Damn their oily hides!”
These teenagers apparently pulled that old trick we all did in high school where you go to a Dunkin’ Donuts at night when they’re clearing out all the old donuts to try and score some free ones (they’re only a little stale — still good!), but on this particular occasion, they were refused said day-old donuts.
After what I assume was some cajoling, the teens were told to come back later for the pastries they originally showed up for. When they returned and started eating these donuts, they realized that soap wasn’t really a flavor, took ill, and called the police.
Dunkin’ Donuts addressed the incident in a statement:
“At Dunkin’ Donuts restaurants, the safety and well-being of customers is a top priority and we have stringent food safety standards for all restaurants. We are aware of the incident involving a crew member at a Dunkin’ Donuts franchise in Oakton, Virginia.
In this instance, we have been informed by the franchise owner that he has terminated the employee involved and is cooperating fully with the local authorities. As this is a pending police matter, it is inappropriate for us to comment further and, as such, any additional questions can be directed to the police department.”[QUOTE]
First of all, I take umbrage with Dunkin’ Donuts calling themselves a restaurant. Actual restaurants typically don’t devote 75% of their menu to dessert. Call yourselves a bakery, for Christ’s sake. Show some pride in what you do.
Secondly, I really want to know where the employee saw this going and why he or she thought this was a good idea. Did they think they were gonna poison a bunch of kids and get off scot-free? This isn’t Florida where you can get away with anything, this is northern Virginia, and we don’t stand for that sort of thing in here.
Thirdly, if this person wanted to really stick it to these kids, just let them eat the donuts. Someone in my office brought in Dunkin’ Donuts today, and I want to die as a result of eating a donut and a buttload of munchkins every single time I walk by the kitchen.
On the real, though, Dunkin’ Donuts Boston Creme is some good shit. I just hope my next one doesn’t contain poison..