======= ======= ====== ====== ====== ===== ==== ====== ====== ===== ==== ======= ======= ====== ====== ====== ===== ==== ====== ====== ===== ====
I see them on the train on the way into work and I see them in bars on the weekend. I see them in different shades of red, brown, blue, and green. Everywhere I go. Everywhere I turn they are unmistakable. Unavoidable. They are not ugly jackets, but in just over three years time they have become an eyesore to me. I saw them start popping up around 2014, I think.
Maybe it’s because I can’t afford one. I’m sure that is a small part of why I hate them. But it’s so much more than the price tag that bothers me.
Canada Goose has been around for a long time. They’ve been a popular brand amongst expeditioners who choose to travel to the coldest parts of our world since the 50s and for good reason. Canada Goose makes a quality product. I’ve had the opportunity to try a friend’s Canada Goose jacket on before. They’re obviously warm, and the name implies that their jackets are 100% goose down. And that’s all well and good.
If you’re an explorer on the North Pole, by all means, feel free to buy yourself a Canada Goose or some other jacket of that ilk.
The same goes for Arcteryx stuff. What the fuck are you doing wearing a jacket that was designed for people planning to climb Mount Everest? That’s not even an exaggeration. Arcteryx started out much like Canada Goose in that it was intended for people embarking on adventures through the most extremely cold, frozen tundra on Earth.
The people I see in Canada Goose down jackets are not fucking Ernest Shackleton. They’re executive assistants and low-level finance bros who deemed the outrageous price tag hooked to a Canada Goose to be a necessary expenditure for a winter spent in Chicago, Philly, NYC, or Boston.
Look, Patagonia and The North Face make some great stuff. But at least their prices are semi-reasonable. Canada Goose? Arcteryx? You’re not going to be able to look me in the eye and justify a purchase that you made from either one of these places unless you tell me that you’re visiting a polar ice cap in the near future.
Think long and hard about what it is you do with a jacket during the winter months. You wear it work every day. There is no doubt in my mind that many of you probably have some long walks to work in pretty cold weather.
But then the weekend comes and you hit a bar with a bunch of your friends. What do you do with your jacket that costs a little bit less than your monthly rent? You throw it on the back of a chair or in a nearby booth and forget about it for the night. It’s ridiculous.
You wouldn’t do that with your iPhone X but you do it with your jacket because it’s a fucking jacket. I’ve heard horror stories from friends about getting their jackets stolen at the bar. It’s not a fun night when that happens. You really have to go home and look yourself in the mirror and ask yourself if the price of the jacket is worth it.
I’ll let you in on a secret: it’s not. Go to a Goodwill and buy a down jacket that you won’t care about throwing down haphazardly in a bar. You can have your eight hundred dollar fur lined jacket. I’ve got my dad’s old Pacific Trail coat that he used to shovel the driveway with back when I was just a lad. It’s enormous on me and it’s perfect for walking outside.
The price tag for this baby in 1999 was seventy dollars. Don’t worry, I asked him. And now that I’ve successfully talked you out of buying a Canada Goose for your winter activities, do me a favor and go give the roast hand to that guy or girl in your office who foolishly bought one. .
Image via Wikimedia