======= ======= ====== ====== ====== ===== ==== ====== ====== ===== ==== ======= ======= ====== ====== ====== ===== ==== ====== ====== ===== ====
Me? I love horse races. I don’t care about the odds. I don’t care about the track conditions. I don’t care about where in the world it is.
Case in point: Australia’s Melbourne Cup that took place today (or incredibly late last night/early this morning, if you’re living in the United States). The race is, “Australia’s most prestigious Thoroughbred horse race. Marketed as ‘the race that stops a nation,’ it is a 3,200 meter race for three-year-olds and over.” It takes place every year on the first Tuesday in November, and is actually considered to be a national holiday down under. So, yeah, it sounds like The Kentucky Derby took steroids.
I mean, you know it’s going to be lit (did I say that right?) when there’s a Snapchat story around it, so here’s a rundown of what happened.
This biscuit pushed a cop into a bed of flowers before getting arrested / acting like she had no idea what she had done:
A woman has been arrested after she pushed a police officer into a garden bed at Flemington. https://t.co/8mINHoaYNB
— 7 News Melbourne (@7NewsMelbourne) November 3, 2015
This dude (via Snapchat) wore a tuxedo and took a chopper to the track, because that’s what rich ballers do.
…and then there were just a bunch of people who clearly had no idea where they were.
Sadly it's not the day that stops the drunk Australian bogans. #MelbourneCup https://t.co/mcH5ZrJsEV @newscomauHQ pic.twitter.com/fXduXIz3KN
— Steve Williams (@randomswill) November 3, 2015
Memory blanks from y'day?
Better hope you didn't end up on 'Drunk Girls of #MelbourneCup' page http://t.co/8H8PPDn5wQ pic.twitter.com/bDDEbtijiO
— Herald Sun (@theheraldsun) November 4, 2014
Including all these people, via the BBC.
But, per usual, Instagram takes the cake for being an absolute talent show. I’ve got a theory that Australia produces the hottest girls, and these photos prove that it’s not just because of the accent.
…including the winning jockey, because everyone looks hot with a trophy in their hands.
So, yeah, I’m going to need a few weeks off next year to attend both the Melbourne Cup and The Hunt. .
Featured Image via Twitter
Respond
Will
Will (Twitter / Instagram) is the host of The Sunday Scaries Podcast.
@willdefries
@willdefries
defriewf
will@grandex.co
The cop-shover is a smoke show. 10/10 would bail her out of jail.
Probably couldn’t afford her bail. PGP.
I bringing the tie limbo to my next wedding.
Not that anyone cares, but my wife went to this when she did study abroad and said it makes the Kentucky Derby look like a boring Bar Mitzvah.
I’ve never been to a boring Bar Mitzvah
You’re probably right. Was thinking about the alliteration more than the quality of the simile.
Those women make me question every decision I’ve ever made
New addition to the bucket list
Time to dust off the passport boys.