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Despite the heavy attention it has attracted recently, ghosting isn’t really a new phenomenon. I’d imagine ghosting is probably as old as dating itself. The first major homo erectus exodus from the Great Rift Valley was probably just a bunch of guys bailing after bad dates, followed by the women trying to track them down. Now, I’m not a serial poltergeist, but I’ve ghosted and been ghosted, so I completely understand what would make even the most reasonable guy ghost some girl, whether or not she’s a nice girl. It’s often her fault.
The quickest way to get ghosted is false advertising. This is typical of dating apps, blind dates, and social media meet ups but is also applicable to meeting in the wild. If you show up 20 pounds heavier than advertised, don’t expect a call back. It’s not going to happen. Put yourself on a dating embargo and hit the gym for a month if you have to. I’ve done it. The world is shallow. Deal with it. I’ve ghosted two girls for this, and I don’t feel bad about it. Girls can’t take the high ground anyways, as a top three reason girls ghost is if you show up shorter than they thought you were. At least some of y’all ask the height question so some poor schmuck doesn’t drop $50 for nothing. Maybe some guys should just ask women if they’re fat. Or just soberly snag a date in the wild the old fashioned way.
Another way to get ghosted is if you’re boring. Things that garner a guy’s attention: having a sense of humor, standing out, and sex. Boring, plain, or being a tease will absolutely get you ghosted. Some guys like the chase but most guys aren’t going to exert the level of effort a girl thinks she’s worth. If a girl can’t hold her end of a conversation and maintain some level of interest, why would a guy want to sit through another brutally grueling conversation? Most importantly, a girl should stand out in a good way or she’ll get ghosted. What makes this one girl different than the 20 other girls texting a guy? Is she, like, in PR with a bachelors and likes pizza, queso, puppies, and Netflix? OMG, no way. Give me something to work with. It’s easier than it seems.
The final reason girls get ghosted is that he’s interested in someone else. Either a competitor outshined them or made herself a little more available. Those are in a girl’s power. But guys can also get hung up on an ex, another girl they have been seeing or nailing, or an upcoming date. These are outside of a girl’s power, and yeah they suck, but it’s really no different from when a girl ghosts a guy. But guys are generally seen as the villain when people talk about ghosting, and that’s just not true.
Most of the reasons girls get ghosted are completely preventable by the girl, but that doesn’t make changes easy. Women can thank the bitchiest of their kind for making guys stay at arm’s length in the first place. Not that it matters. Ghosting isn’t going anywhere because at the end of the day lost interest is lost interest and human beings are generally awful anyways, so they’ll avoid the awkward conversation and Casper the hell out of you..
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