Wedding Couple Forces Guests To Partake In A Reception Music Video, Makes Me Vomit

I don’t know who started the trend of #ViralWeddings, but I have a plea for those of you considering having one: Please stop it. Why would you want to turn what should be a celebration with close friends and family into a YouTube sensation? That doesn’t make any sense. Perhaps I am just a cynical bastard, but if one of my friends tried to create a viral video at his wedding, I’d probably leave.

The latest #ViralWedding offender is below. A couple forced 250 guests into a lip-sync fest featuring every song our local KISS FM station played during my morning commute today. If you are anything like me, you’ll be cringing within 20 seconds.

From the video description:

Robert & Teresa surprised their guests at the end of their wedding reception with a secret mission. The secret mission (hidden within a manila envelope taped underneath the table) was to shoot a music video with all 250 guests! Guests were briefed for a quick 10 minutes and put into position before the cameras started rolling.

If you know Robert & Teresa, it should be no surprise that this superhero-themed wedding turned into an epic mashup of all kinds of crazy. I mean, they do own a Ninja themed sushi restaurant so they quite enjoy crazy.

“Guests were briefed for a quick 10 minutes and put into position before the cameras started rolling.”

At the moment when the first suggestion for a music video was being made by the wedding DJ, I would have straight–lined for the bathroom and hung out in there for 20 minutes. Or maybe I would have gone home.

Robert and Teresa, you seem like good people. I respect your love for each other and for IHeartRadio Top-40 songs, but knock it the fuck off. Not all of us want to dance around to “Shots” like we are some background dancers in your make-believe, pop-star world. We want to drink ourselves into a coma because we haven’t found the happiness that you have, you assholes. Quit rubbing your love and admiration in our faces. Don’t say: “It’s for the kids,” either, you weirdos. I know it was all for you.

Do not force your wedding guests into doing anything remotely like this, people. Let them drink, dance, possibly hook up with your cousin and then pass out at the nearby DoubleTree, in peace.

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