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Everyone compares themselves to characters on popular television shows. With hit shows like Friends, The Office, Curb Your Enthusiasm, How I Met Your Mother, etc., pop culture seems to be so potent in our lives that it’s almost easier to compare ourselves to fictional characters than use specific adjectives. If you claim to have never done this, either you’re lying… or someone has assigned you a character you dislike and you hold a grudge. Even the Myers-Briggs tests give you a list of fictional personalities that match your own. But if you are a part of any close group of gal pals, it’s likely you’ve had the conversation of “which Sex and the City character are you?”
This is a big generalization, but I’d argue that most girls want to be dubbed the “Carrie” of the group, with “Samantha” and “Charlotte” being close seconds. Carrie is the talented, creative, deep thinking protagonist where everyone else’s storyline falls after her own. She’s the one who makes great fashion choices, has an exciting dating life, and isn’t afraid to take risks. Samantha is the fabulous, man-eating, sex-vixen with a badass career, tons of amazing connections, and no time for bullshit. Charlotte is the sweet sorority, pearl-wearing, modest proper type of girl who always goes to bat for her friends when they need her.
But Miranda? Nobody wants to be the “Miranda.”
Miranda is the one who had braces in her 30s, horrific haircuts, and weight she couldn’t keep off no matter how hard she tried. She’s the cynical one. The practical one. Dare I say, the boring one. Calling your friend the “Miranda” was unequivocally understood that they’re the frumpy, unlucky, and maybe even overall-wearing one. Suffice it to say, it was a bit of a diss.
But as I get older? I can’t help but see Miranda Hobbes as the most relatable of them all.
My friend Dani tweeted it loudly and clearly:
the journey through your twenties means witnessing yourself transform from a Carrie to a Miranda.
not anything to do with their personalities, it's just at one point I wore a bandana as a shirt– and now I'm pretty sure I would eat cake out of a trash can.
— damned – yell 😈 (@DaniNye) May 31, 2018
Reading that solidified it for me: Most of us are all Mirandas now. Everyone has such a genuine love for Carrie Bradshaw with her amazing clothes, cool job, and entertaining lifestyle. But nearing my 30s (yikes), I see Carrie more as what would be a “social media influencer” in today’s world rather than a relatable human being. She serves as a vision board of really cool ideas of how it would be to live our lives, but it isn’t necessarily practical. Of COURSE, people want to be “the Carrie.” People love to think that their own life is much more exciting and interesting than it actually may be.
In my teens, I wanted to be a timeless beauty like Charlotte who’s goal was to get married and have babies. In my early twenties, I wanted to be an effortlessly charismatic and sexually liberated hybrid of Carrie and Samantha. But now? After all these years, I (and many others) realize how hesitant I’ve been to embrace my inner Miranda. But I’m here for it, because she’s actually pretty badass.
Hear me out. Miranda buys real estate instead of heels. She believes soulmates are for Hallmark cards. She never apologized for her career success. She proclaimed the most honest advice for her friends, even when they didn’t want to hear it. She unapologetically served up zingers to strangers when they needed to be put in to check. She awkwardly runs into her exes and can’t stick to her diets. She fearlessly asked life’s hardest questions when it came to dating. And she’s the one who ended up with someone perfect for her, not because he was a soulmate, but because they put a ton of time and effort towards their relationship.
Sure, she eats cake out of the trash can sometimes. We all have our flaws. But in reality, most of us are “the Miranda,” and that’s actually really cool. .