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I know March Madness is on most people’s minds right now, but I woke up this morning, saw dew on the grass outside of my apartment and fell effortlessly into a Masters highlights wormhole. Now is right around the time when you’ll start seeing commercials for The Masters in between TV timeouts for basketball so this is semi-timely. Enjoy some music as you read through the rest of this blog.
This aforementioned wormhole eventually led me to probably the most watched golf clip of all time, which took place on the 16th hole at the most famous golf course in the world – Augusta National. And you know which clip I’m talking about.
Even the most casual golf fan can attest to this clips brilliance. It’s not just the chip shot, either. It’s the expert camera work. That hi-resolution zoom into a ball flirting with the edge of the cup and absolutely toying with the gallery. It’s a thing of beauty. But most importantly, it’s Verne Lundquist in a booth perched high above the green, unable to contain himself when the ball finally drops into the cup.
It was April 2005, and I was in middle school without a care in the world. I was finally starting to put up consistently decent numbers on the golf course and I was a Tiger Woods fanboy through and through, basking in his dominance along with every other teenager that had even a cursory interest in golf.
Tiger Woods was in his prime, still happily married and banging waitresses purely for sport. With three holes to play in the ‘05 Masters, he held a precarious one-shot lead over Chris Dimarco. After sailing a tee shot left of the green on the 16th, a bogey was the most probable outcome for Tiger, and it looked like it would be a two-man tie with two holes to play.
There’s a good chance he doesn’t get this inside Dimarco’s ball.
You foolish, stupid man. These were the famous last words of Lundquist’s partner (whom I’m assuming left the broadcasting profession forever after daring to doubt Tiger in a moment like this) in the booth on that fateful day on the 16th hole. The rest, as they say, is history.
When I see Verne Lundquist’s name in print or I hear it out loud, I don’t think about his legendary calls during SEC football games or college basketball classics. “YES SIR!” is the only phrase that comes to mind. You can just tell that Verne was a HUGE Tiger guy back in 2005 and I know that sports announcers are supposed to be unbiased journalists but like….how can you not become a full-blooded Tiger fanboy after that chip in? “IN YOUR LIFE HAVE YOU SEEN ANYTHING LIKE THAT?!?”
That clip, along with the call from Verne, has me wanting to toss all of my papers up into the air like that one meme and try and find a heated driving range somewhere near my apartment.
And you know what one of the craziest things about this final round at Augusta was? Tiger bogeyed the final two holes and Dimarco forced a playoff.
Tiger, of course, went on to win the playoff, but making that chip shot on 16 and then losing the green jacket to fucking Chris Dimarco would have been such a buzzkill for this story. Glad he was able to pull it out. If he could bring some of this magic back to his current 2018 game I wouldn’t be mad, but I’m not delusional.
I don’t think the Tiger of yore is ever coming back, and it’s why I’m fully on the Brandt Snedeker bandwagon. That’s a story for a different day, though. I’d also like to preemptively apologize to everyone reading this who is now going to spend the rest of their day watching classic highlights from The Masters. Better open up another tab with work-related shit on it just in case your boss walks by your desk. Thanks for reading. .
Image via YouTube