“I just wanted to give you a quick update…”

I just realized that my job makes me go through the 5 stages of grief…every single day. PGP

“Is it me guys, or does it feel like it should be Friday?” PGP.

My friends and I just bet on who had the highest credit score. I lost. PGP.

Deleting all browsing history, every day. PGPM.

My division director sent out an email saying there would be no bonuses this year, followed by another email with pictures of his new corvette…..which is parked in his driveway next to his other four corvettes. PGP.

My quarterly performance review is coming up. I hope I get fired. PGP

The Urban Dictionary app is atop my used apps because I don’t understand new words and acronyms. PGP.

My day doesn’t really begin until coffee and I destroy a toilet. PGP

I respond “tentative” to every calendar invite to give the appearance that I am busier than I really am. PGP.