As of today, I am thrilled to announce that I have dumped my girlfried at Denny’s and will be taking my talents to the nearest strip club. I’d like to thank my Will DeFries for helping me achieve my dreams and I am so happy to begin this next chapter of my life, “Things Todd Does When He Is Single.”
Corkscrew BBQ in Spring. They sell out daily. On Saturdays, they do beef ribs that you have to eat with a fork because it slides off the bone. You have to get there by 10:30 at the latest, but they offer free beer while you wait in line.
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You could have taken that $200, spent it on a fuckload of fireworks, and had hours of fun shooting them at each other.
Your hardcore torture porn link has me more scared to click than deFries’ chronicle this week.
“My kid isn’t getting a phone until he can throw a football 50 yards.”
Drink Pepsi?
As of today, I am thrilled to announce that I have dumped my girlfried at Denny’s and will be taking my talents to the nearest strip club. I’d like to thank my Will DeFries for helping me achieve my dreams and I am so happy to begin this next chapter of my life, “Things Todd Does When He Is Single.”
Corkscrew BBQ in Spring. They sell out daily. On Saturdays, they do beef ribs that you have to eat with a fork because it slides off the bone. You have to get there by 10:30 at the latest, but they offer free beer while you wait in line.
The psycho bitch you are going to dump at Thanksgiving dinner:
Check in tomorrow.
Intern’s doing your job better than you. PGP.
I think it’s that all day and all night everything they see is blue like them, inside and outside.
Ok, I thought you were suggesting that you would rather eat ham like a fucking pagan.
Are you comparing Turkey to all other foods, or all other meats?
I have a feeling that all these names were thought up by a girl that just had a wild time at Rumspringa.
That might be the best cameo in the history of cinema.
Did you write this for me?