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Courtesy of the Red White and Blue
Better homage than the ‘burbs kid yesterday. Granted, that feat wasn’t hard to top
A swing and a miss
I’d prefer to just not speak to anyone
Spare phone charger is a must
Maybe get rid of those 19 cats, they can’t be cheap to maintain
Even worse is when they include their pet wearing the vintage chalkboard around its neck showing the date of the wedding
Novel concept: say what you actually intend to say the first time
“In other words, men are simply more slovenly than women, and less averse to filth.” Isn’t it possible that men just aren’t as filthy, therefore less time is needed to clean up after one’s self?
The man swimming with lions in the pool…is that a normal thing?
We have very different definitions of ‘killing it’
Befriend the security guard as well as janitorial staff. They know everyone and everything
These hoes aint loyal
I fail to see the issue, you could always just NOT take them up on the offer. Simple.
Doesn’t matter, had sex
The Lion King will always reign supreme
So, what constitutes a ‘fuck ton’ of mayo?
If she smokes, she pokes
7. Her bluetooth connected phone reads sexts when you’re in the car with her. Yep. That happened.
26. Chew your lunch with your mouth open while carrying on conversation