Sent a department-wide email with a catastrophic typo. PGP.

Got paid on Friday. Checked my bank account this morning. Apparently, spent 50% of it on t-shirts from my favorite brewery back home. Priorities, right? PGP.

I mentioned to my parents that I take toilet paper from hotels during business trips and now they’re convinced I’m having money trouble. PGP.

Accidentally bought a jumbo pack of single ply toilet paper. PGP.

Filling out my bracket gives me more anxiety than anything at my job. PGP.

Dismissed for “lack of ambition” after personally choosing 9.5 hour days at the office. PGP.

I was the only one left in the office at 5:00, and the janitor came by my desk and informed me, “You know, you’re not getting any extra credit for staying late.” PGP.

Calling in sick for Monday during brunch on Sunday. PGP.