Brushing your teeth while peeing in the morning to save time. PGP.

That moment of anxiety between logging into your bank account and waiting for the page to load. PGP.

Getting caught staring out the window, looking like a “puppy that can’t wait to get outside.” PGP.

Waiting 5 minutes after your boss leaves early, then leaving early. PGP.

I swear every single person in my office sneezes like a fucking freak. PGP.

“Risky Business” Halloween costume doubling as Skype interview attire. PGP.

Needing 2-3 years experience for every entry level job, which makes absolutely no sense. PGP.

Ending an email with a passive-aggressive smiley face. PGP.

My tinder matches are really starting to scrape the bottom of the barrel. PGP.

Getting to use the shredder being the highlight of your day. PGP.