Nothing kills a buzz faster than finding out you don’t have President’s Day off at 6 p.m. on Sunday. PGP.

I was going to quit drinking during the work week for my NY resolution but Clemson and Bama are in the National Championship. PGP.

The sarcastic “good for you” when you tell a coworker you’ll be off on Friday. PGP.

I give zero fucks about what grade your kid is about to start. PGP.

We’re getting a Chick Fil A a block from my office. I haven’t been this excited since we got a new copier last month. This is my life now.

I’m going to take a meteorologist’s approach to work: “there’s a 50% chance I’ll get this right”

Accidentally started paying attention on a conference call so I’m typing this

Our vp of research forgot to close his eHarmony tab before he shared his screen on a company wide video conference

Meet The Press has become a thing in my house

Saw a waitress storm out and quit today…I haven’t been this inspired in a while