Pepto Bismol

A professional business person by day, a professional goofball by night. I enjoy a strong whiskey ginger and a nice bubble butt to grab a hold of in the evening. I putt like a champ, but spend most of my days in the rough cause of my slice. A first date with me will always be a mystery because I don't buy the Groupon for dinner until the morning of.

Member Since 06/07/2013

I always volunteer to clean out the fridge in the break room every month so I can get some free food that may or may not have spoiled. PGP.

Post Grad Problems

My boss’s boss told me that I could leave early. My boss said I can’t leave early. PGP.

Post Grad Problems

Counting down the days until FebruAny at Subway. PGP.

Post Grad Problems

Someone destroyed my secret bathroom before I even got into the office this morning. PGP.

Post Grad Problems

Some girl at homecoming was trying to guess my age and said 35. I’m 27. PGP.

Post Grad Problems

Still trying to convince myself that I am one, really big poop away from my pants fitting right again. PGP.

Post Grad Problems

They forgot to up-charge me for guac today. I feel like I just won the lottery. PGP.

Post Grad Problems

The lady at my favorite Chinese restaurant gave me an extra egg roll and a wink because I said “Ni Hao” to her. That’s the most action I’ve gotten in two months. PGP.

Post Grad Problems

Answering the phone on speaker every time a call comes in. PGPM.

Post Grad Problems

“I know it’s past 3:00, but can I still get the lunch size General Tso?” PGP.

Post Grad Problems