Five days. Five engagements. Five more future vacation days used. PGP.

Last night, I had a dream I bought a Maserati. The entire dream I worried about my credit, car payments, and repair costs. I woke up in a cold sweat. PGP.

Too old to have roommates. Too poor to live alone. PGP.

Telling the interns stories that start with “back in my day.” PGP.

What the fuck happened? PGP.

I actually have a lot of responsibility and very little oversight at my job. It’s terrifying. PGP.

“I hear there are hot guys on the 9th floor.” PGP.

Only thing worse than my golf swing is my entire body the next day. PGP.

Doing a Tiger pump when you see all the bathroom stalls are empty. PGP.

My best friend has a smoking hot fiancée and bought a house. I find myself resenting him. PGP.