Paramount released the movie Team America: World Police years ago where Kim Jong Il dies at the end, and it made lots of money and was well reviewed. What’s changed since then is that North Korea has adopted Islamic-terrorist tactics and we’ve become even bigger pussies than before.
Great article. In actuality, college football IS the best reality TV, most guys just don’t realize they’re watching a story unfold. In every game there are storylines, protagonists and antagonists, plot twists, surprise endings, and then in December/January you see the season finale of every team’s story. Oh, and plus there’s drinking and snacks.
I don’t even try to read anything labeled YA anymore. I tried to read that Fault In Our Stars book and made it two chapters before quitting because it was so shitty. And it somehow has like 9,000 positive reviews on Amazon.
I’m trying to decide whether the Walmart employees who didn’t find a 75% discount suspicious: (1) are incredibly stupid; (2) simply don’t give a flying fuck; or (3) actively want to destroy Walmart from the inside out, à la South Park. My guess is some combination of 1 & 2, and probably 3 subconsciously.
You forgot the possibility that Topanga has terminal elephantitus and John has committed his life to selfless acts of charity for a childhood friend.
You two are going to make a great couple.
Kim Jong Un, is that you?
Nobody roves him
Perhaps it was in bad taste, but it doesn’t justify threatening to kill people who go see it.
Paramount released the movie Team America: World Police years ago where Kim Jong Il dies at the end, and it made lots of money and was well reviewed. What’s changed since then is that North Korea has adopted Islamic-terrorist tactics and we’ve become even bigger pussies than before.
Nothing makes me more angry than knowing Sony and the theater chains capitulated to these assholes.
I wasn’t saying these aren’t hilarious (they are), but I’d imagine the joke gets a little more dark and depressing every year.
Gonna go out on a limb here and predict that the single Christmas cards won’t be ending anytime soon for this boozy bachelorette.
Having a laughably pathetic romantic life. PGP.
11. The Dom Perignon shake, spray, and pour over titties. Subtle yet shows interest.
You can probably imagine my disappointment when I realized this is NOT an article about receiving a rim job. Misleading title.
12. The dick grab. No mistaking the intentions there.
Not going to lie: I scrolled back and forth between “I’m all for sex.” and your author bio picture about ten times.
Finding out you’re fired by checking Twitter at work. PGP.
Great article. In actuality, college football IS the best reality TV, most guys just don’t realize they’re watching a story unfold. In every game there are storylines, protagonists and antagonists, plot twists, surprise endings, and then in December/January you see the season finale of every team’s story. Oh, and plus there’s drinking and snacks.
I don’t even try to read anything labeled YA anymore. I tried to read that Fault In Our Stars book and made it two chapters before quitting because it was so shitty. And it somehow has like 9,000 positive reviews on Amazon.
Guess it’s time to use this one next time I go to the club
I’m trying to decide whether the Walmart employees who didn’t find a 75% discount suspicious: (1) are incredibly stupid; (2) simply don’t give a flying fuck; or (3) actively want to destroy Walmart from the inside out, à la South Park. My guess is some combination of 1 & 2, and probably 3 subconsciously.
Rock Out With Your Hawk Out, I guess.