If I told you I was having caviar infused lobster bisque before moving onto the finest 8 oz filet mignon would you believe me? Because it isn’t true. I’m having texmex with the grandparents, so free dinner
Reverse the order of sports for dates. Coming from a Texan (not a fan of the team, fuck Houston), but hockey is one of the best date sports to watch. Perfect excuse for them to get close and its not unbearably long.
I’ve accidentally turned my birthday into a full month, so we’re doing the 4th or 5th party for my birthday tonight, I’m really not sure at this point, but tomorrow I get a break and get to go to my ex girlfriend’s house warming party because she moved in with one of my best friends. At least I have a new James Blunt album to bump over the weekend.
For drinks or entertainment? Because the answer is both. Watching him get rejected is even better. Recently someone poured 2 full drinks on him (he 100% deserved it). #RIPVodkaSodas
Throwing my third annual St Patrick’s Day Parade Death March. 2 kegs, chicken minis, dead by 11 AM. Also the girl I adore is in town, so that will be fun.
I can’t wait until the protagonist from TGDAG is single for their stories to cross. it won’t matter if the dude here is single or not, he seems like the cheating type.
Are you saying sleep directly on my mattress, allowing my blood sweat and tears to soak into the same surface and spot I sleep on every night without the ability to wash those out? You sir, are a madman. I bet you eat your steaks well done.
Advertise
“That golf drink you like” might be the greatest line ever written in this series.
Dylan couldn’t throw a nerf vortex 10 yards.
St Patricks Day is the closest we’ll get after graduation.
Tell him to use it for a few months then go to his CC company and ask for an increased credit limit, simple as that.
If I told you I was having caviar infused lobster bisque before moving onto the finest 8 oz filet mignon would you believe me? Because it isn’t true. I’m having texmex with the grandparents, so free dinner
Reverse the order of sports for dates. Coming from a Texan (not a fan of the team, fuck Houston), but hockey is one of the best date sports to watch. Perfect excuse for them to get close and its not unbearably long.
This was a shitpost. I appreciate it and believe we need more of this.
I’ve accidentally turned my birthday into a full month, so we’re doing the 4th or 5th party for my birthday tonight, I’m really not sure at this point, but tomorrow I get a break and get to go to my ex girlfriend’s house warming party because she moved in with one of my best friends. At least I have a new James Blunt album to bump over the weekend.
Please tell me she went to the bar, got a full drink and dumped it on him.
Hey Dave, Sup?
The Delta support employee is all of us in 2017, or at least me right now; is it too early to leave work?
For drinks or entertainment? Because the answer is both. Watching him get rejected is even better. Recently someone poured 2 full drinks on him (he 100% deserved it). #RIPVodkaSodas
This guy sounds like a watered down version of one of my friends and I hate the fact I’m associated with him now.
Throwing my third annual St Patrick’s Day Parade Death March. 2 kegs, chicken minis, dead by 11 AM. Also the girl I adore is in town, so that will be fun.
I can’t wait until the protagonist from TGDAG is single for their stories to cross. it won’t matter if the dude here is single or not, he seems like the cheating type.
Have you ever eaten a sandwich with caviar instead of meat? Neither have I, so I’m probably just going to have some chorizo, egg and cheese tacos.
Are you saying sleep directly on my mattress, allowing my blood sweat and tears to soak into the same surface and spot I sleep on every night without the ability to wash those out? You sir, are a madman. I bet you eat your steaks well done.
Huge fan of this Bill. Do the tuxedo column next
Y’all ever had leftover fried chicken and thrown it in a tortilla? Me neither, so I’m probably going to just have chorizo egg and cheese tacos.
Just realized I commented on the wrong article. I’ll take my laps