Swiped right on an ex’s Bumble profile.

Wishing you had a more ergonomic chair. PGP.

“Cash me outside, how bout dah?” Has finally infiltrated my office. PGP.

Never been messaged on Bumble. PGP.

New Year, New Me, same morning road rage. PGP.

Opened underwear from my deployed boyfriend that said “sexually deprived for your freedom” in front of my super conservative parents and grandparents. Merry Christmas. PGP.

Boss just asked me if I owned a YouTube. PGP.

You know you’re getting old when your friends all start having planned pregnancies. PGP.