Getting asked, “Who are you voting for?”, before 2015 is even over. PGP.

Break room toaster was thrown out for attracting ants. Now I have to microwave my Pop Tarts like some animal. PGP.

I don’t always take a shit at work, but when I do, I take at least half an hour. PGP.

When “Hey, how’s it going?” leads into “Hey, would you mind…?” PGP.

“Just another friendly reminder….” PGP.

Never realized the extent of my immaturity until I attended today’s sexual misconduct seminar. PGP.

Pretty sure I’m the guy who’s always humming in my office. PGP.

I fell asleep before the Blackhawks even got to OT last night. PGP.

Having to learn from Forbes Magazine that my undergraduate degree is useless. PGP.

NSFW only applies when you don’t have your own office. PGPM.