Does everyone tip bathroom attendants? I feel like a dick every time but I’m just not going to give a guy $1 for handing me one paper towel to dry my hands (everyone knows you need at least three to properly dry them)
“Washed up” guy, give us a break. You came home trying to peacock around town, failed, and now you’re looking to support yourself with a washed up claim. You don’t even know washed up until you feel like you’ve been drinking for three days only to look at your watch and realize you’ve only been at the bar for two hours, then have a panic attack about your future hangover.
Love bomb dude, use caution. Love is a beautiful thing but once you say it, there is no going back. Plus, always remember, people in love don’t do cool things like anal or threesomes.
I’ve found the best birth control is to stop working out, drink beer every day after work and yell at the tv during football season with pieces of Oreo flying out of your mouth
I always want to try the Ferris/Sloane role play except it always ends up with her as Sloane but me more like Cameron with crippling anxiety and depression. BA DUM TIS. have a good one y’all
Let this be a fair warning to any office geriatrics that are thinking about trying this joke this morning or any other morning. You will be punished for your sins.
I’ve gone from “get over yourself and shut up about Game of Thrones” to “holy shit I can’t stop watching” in about a week. I can’t believe I’ve missed out all these years
I’ve always gone with the venture capitalist line from Wedding Crashers about investing in a company that allows homeless people to make their own clothes. People are either so dumb they ask about it or just shrug you off and move on.
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It’s all about the vibe and insta pics. No one wants to listen to Ryan’s shitty playlist and take a pic in front of Nicole’s “fabulous” accent wall
I’m at work today but already in vacation mode. Hope everyone is having a great morning
Does everyone tip bathroom attendants? I feel like a dick every time but I’m just not going to give a guy $1 for handing me one paper towel to dry my hands (everyone knows you need at least three to properly dry them)
What they meant to say is “I love your booty”
#timesup
“Washed up” guy, give us a break. You came home trying to peacock around town, failed, and now you’re looking to support yourself with a washed up claim. You don’t even know washed up until you feel like you’ve been drinking for three days only to look at your watch and realize you’ve only been at the bar for two hours, then have a panic attack about your future hangover.
Love bomb dude, use caution. Love is a beautiful thing but once you say it, there is no going back. Plus, always remember, people in love don’t do cool things like anal or threesomes.
Shout was hands down the best part of our reception. I also cut ties with anyone that wasn’t on the dance floor jumping up and down
He looks straight out of a Simple Plan music video
Which Houston spot has the best Eggs Benedict? I’m new to team Eggs Benny and looking to find the best
I’ve found the best birth control is to stop working out, drink beer every day after work and yell at the tv during football season with pieces of Oreo flying out of your mouth
I always want to try the Ferris/Sloane role play except it always ends up with her as Sloane but me more like Cameron with crippling anxiety and depression. BA DUM TIS. have a good one y’all
Let this be a fair warning to any office geriatrics that are thinking about trying this joke this morning or any other morning. You will be punished for your sins.
I’ve gone from “get over yourself and shut up about Game of Thrones” to “holy shit I can’t stop watching” in about a week. I can’t believe I’ve missed out all these years
I’ve always gone with the venture capitalist line from Wedding Crashers about investing in a company that allows homeless people to make their own clothes. People are either so dumb they ask about it or just shrug you off and move on.
It’s HOT in the 713 folks. Stay cool and hydrated. Tonight I’m continuing my binge of Game of Thrones (middle of szn 2 now) with some pizza and wine.
Tomorrow the only real option is a pool day, burgers, and Deep Eddy Grapefruit. Maybe a drunken trip to El T for dinner.
Sunday the wife works. Probably going to steal some of her vyvanse and wake up at 2am to watch full Open coverage. Have a blessed weekend y’all
Take anyone’s handicap, add 8 and that’s their real handicap
Hey guys we got a parenting expert over here!!
I have zero country club experience but I have to imagine making all these changes would make it more like a fancy YMCA and not a country club
You’re a style god BD
Seat geek gives you that option. It’s great.
My grandfather tried to sign up for Uber and accidentally applied to be a driver….he got approved