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When I’m at home, I am constantly in a rush. Whether it’s walking to work, a store, or just aimlessly wandering around my neighborhood as I am sometimes prone to do, I just feel the need to get to where I’m going as fast as humanly possible.
That anxious, almost nervous feeling I get is probably due to some deep seeded issue that has yet to reveal itself, but that is not really why I penned this column. I live in a fairly large city which lends itself to a very “go, go, go” lifestyle.
I’m always on edge looking for things to do and people to see. If I’m not moving it feels as if I’m wasting away.
On vacation, I am the exact opposite. I go with the flow. There’s nowhere to be because I’m already there, and the last thing I’m feeling is rushed. As many of you are aware (I sincerely apologize for the incessant posts on Instagram and Twitter, but as Will so elegantly put it, I’m adventuring) I am in Italy at the moment.
I traveled here with a fairly large group, and that is where my one very minuscule complaint about this trip comes into play. In a group such as the one I will be with for another two days, everyone has their own agenda.
For every “great idea” that someone has, there is another person screaming from the other end of the table that they have a better idea. It’s chaotic, confusing, and unfortunately makes me resent people who I should definitely not be resenting.
There are people here who have brought that “go, go, go” attitude over to my obscenely nice Tuscan villa and are attempting to ruin my chill time.
I’m conflicted because, in the region of Tuscany where I am staying for two more days, there are lots of options to go out and see different towns and cities. We have access to cars here but is it weird that all I want to do is lounge in my pool and take in the mountainous view with a glass of red in hand?
Of course, I want to experience Italy in all of its glory, but why rent the villa if we’re just traveling two, sometimes three hours out of our way to take guided tours or visit wineries? This is a vacation and sometimes it just feels like I’m checking off things on an itinerary.
I would love to say something along the lines of, “Hey, listen…why don’t you guys go on without me I’ll hold the fort down” but then I feel like a dick and also have a sense that I’m missing out. It’s a catch-22. I lose either way.
I don’t think I’m alone in this line of thinking that traveling with ten or more people is more of a full-time job than a good time. Someone always thinks they’ve got a better plan than the one you or another person has and it wears on everyone.
The sights here in this part of Italy are great. Siena is a gorgeous place and I spent the day there yesterday. But vacation is not a time to be zipping around all of the time and exhausting yourself. It’s a time for reflection and relaxation.
I’ve got Rome, Florence, and the Amalfi Coast coming up without this large group and I will have time then to start taking in more sights and sounds. I guess I should have known beforehand that a group of fifteen is probably going to butt heads but as I type this alone I find myself very happy. This is the first time in a few days that I’ve had thirty minutes alone to just chill.
I absolutely adore everyone that I am with right now, but this setup in Tuscany does not lend itself to privacy. This is the longest, most obnoxious first world problem I’ve ever put down on digital paper but I had to get it off of my chest.
Traveling in large groups simply does not work, and while this Tuscan villa is probably the nicest place I’ve ever had the privilege of resting my head at night, I could not be happier to be traveling to Rome by train on Thursday. I hope you’re all enjoying life back stateside, and I’d strongly advise against a trip anywhere where you’ll be with more than six or seven people. .
Respond
jduda@grandex.co
Everyone feels super bad for you, man. Sounds treacherous.
Yeah fuck, I’d hate to have to be in Italy in a Villa. Truly feel for you must be a terrible time.
I hate going to the bars with a large group, much less another country.
Traveling by yourself is very underrated.
Agreed, but only for a week or less. More than that and drinking by yourself (or with randoms) starts to get kind of depressing
You could always just pull a Kevin McCallister
I’ve never claimed to be a role model, but you make a good point.
Low key Kevin came out like gangbusters in those Home Alone. Didn’t have to fly 9 hours, didn’t have to hang out in his uncle’s apartment watching french tv and eating escargo, and got to eat all the ice cream and pizza he wanted? Even with the whole attempted burglary and murder thing, he definitely had the better week.
I’m totally the type of guy who says “You guys go on without me. I just want to chill here.”
You’re the worst
Everybody’s gotta be ok with somebody doing something by themselves during the day and meeting back up at night. Only way it can work.
I cannot even begin to think how much that would ruin my vacation. I have these same feelings when it comes to deciding where to go to lunch with 5-8 coworkers.
I’ve taken a pretty aggressive policy of doing whatever I want, even if it means doing it alone. For example, lunch time rolls around and nobody has floated a good suggestion around, I’ll tell a couple of people where I’m going, and they’re free to join me. If they don’t like it, they can do what they want. It’s been more enjoyable than I expected.
I’m lost at how someone who a few weeks ago was sleeping on an air mattress can suddenly trek off to Tuscany for a few days
My living nightmare: travelling and having to put up with a bunch of people for days on end.