Tom Brady’s Appeal Denied, Flew Too Close To The Sun

Tom Brady Suspension Upheld

My, oh my, how the mighty have fallen. It seems like Deflategate and all of the hullabaloo surrounding it happened ten years ago from the amount of coverage that I’ve had to endure from SportsCenter. The self-righteous Patriots fanbase and their Lord and savior, Mr. Tom Brady, have finally been brought to justice, as it was recently announced that Brady will officially serve a four-game suspension. In all honesty, I thought this was going to get overturned because owner Tom Kraft and the entire Patriots organization is the golden goose of the league. They get privileges that other teams don’t. You know it. I know it. They know it.

Listen, I really don’t give a shit one way or another if those guys deflated a couple footballs. They beat the tar out of the Colts that day in the AFC Championship. They probably could have thrown Drew Bledsoe’s old ass behind center and still won that game. But this suspension is about principles.

The Pats organization has flown way too close to the sun too many times for them not to get caught with their hand in the cookie jar. They just always seem to luck out, so as a diehard Lions fan who doesn’t really get to root about much, this is a nice day for me. Let me have this one. Once the season starts, all I really have to look forward to is another lackluster 7-9 season.

Tom Brady is too nice. He’s too good looking. He’s just too perfect. I have to hate him. I have no choice in the matter. So enjoy that four-game suspension, Tom. Hopefully Jimmy G. can go 2-2 for y’all in the first four and not ruin the season.

[via ESPN]

Image via Joseph Sohm / Shutterstock

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Johnny D

fashion icon. @dudaronomy on twitter. e-mail:

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