This Is The Only Reason You Should Stop Drinking

This Is The Only Reason You Should Stop Drinking

Aside from getting it tattooed on your forehead in Arial Black, nothing screams “I’M A 23–30 YEAR OLD IN A SOLID INCOME BRACKET!” quite like drinking away your savings. It’s true: the only way we function through the peaks of Tinder matches and the valleys of coffee spillages day after day is in pursuit of that sweet, confidence-boosting liquid known to the French as “le booze.” But how much is this addiction-that-we’re-not-ready-to-admit-is-an-addiction costing us? One nerd teamed up with his romantic partner by the name of Microsoft Excel to figure it out:

According to the U.S. Department of Health & Human Services, the bracket brake down is as follows:

Bronze: 7 drinks per week (1 per day): Top 30% of alcohol drinkers in the U.S.
Silver: 14 drinks per week (2 per day): Top 20% of alcohol drinkers in the U.S.
Gold: 74 drinks per week (10 per day): Top 10% of alcohol drinkers in the U.S.

How does this translate into the cold stuff? Let’s say you’re a heavy drinker who prefers a recluse environment instead of physically going to a watering hole. Considering most people spending $10 on a bottle of wine, with your drinking habits, it could cost you as much as $100 per week including taxes, or over $400 per month. Annually that’s almost $5,000. And if you’re someone who prefers social interaction over the comfort of your moss green recliner, the story is even grimmer.

The article goes on to state:

Let’s say you go out twice per week – once during the work week and once on a Friday or Saturday night. When you go out to a bar during the week, you will usually order food with your drink. And with most people ordering two drinks, plus tip, you are looking at around $40-$50 for the evening. On the weekend, a typical night out at a bar is a little different. You will most likely take advantage of the fact that there’s no work the next day, and order several drinks over the course of the night. You may also order cocktails, shots, or other specialty items to make it a good night. This translates to around $100 for the evening, depending on where you live” (excluding the costs for cab fares, potential bar covers, and other expenses*).

*condoms you probably won’t use

When it’s all said and done, you’re looking at $150 per week on average. That’s $600 a month and almost $7,500 annually. Just to put that in perspective: Gentlemen, this would buy you as much as many as six custom suits, and ladies, this would buy you about six teacup micropigs.

Having a little trouble deciding which route to take? Here’s a tip: save some goddamn money and do the cost-benefit analysis yourself.

[via Time]

Image via Shutterstock

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