There are three things in life: money, time and energy. Everything can be fit into those categories in some way or another. When you’re young, you have plenty of time and energy, but no money. When you’re working age (23-55), you have money (some more than others thanks to student loans) and energy, but no time. When you’re old, you have money and time, but no energy.
Right now, I am feeling the working age. Trying to schedule around everyone’s work, baby showers, gym time, children’s parties, holidays, weddings and other life obstacles can really bring me down. In college, my best friends lived across the hallway, or in neighboring campuses that could be visited in a few hours by car. Now, they are scattered across the United States, trying to climb the employment ladder or have just fallen off the face of the earth.
This is a shit situation. Really, the only time we all see each other is for bachelor parties, college football tailgates, or if someone gets married. It’s even difficult seeing my friends that live ten minutes away because there’s always something: someone has to work late, has no money until the next paycheck, is sick or they are off to someone’s wedding or family party. Scheduling any sort of get-together is a hassle.
I almost feel guilty because most days, I’d rather sit at home and wait for the next day to come while habitually drinking my 1-3 beers. Loverboy’s “Everybody’s Working for the Weekend” is an accurate depiction of my existence. Monday is only different from Tuesday because Tuesday is one day closer to Friday, and there’s half off margs at my local Mexican shithole restaurant I go to on a biweekly basis. The worst part about the weekend is that we’re already backlogged with obligations.
I miss seeing people. Every Monday, I already have my next weekend planned. But come Friday, it’s either take a nap, get drunk and be hungover Saturday, stay in on Friday, get drunk on Saturday and have a hungover Sunday, or relax all weekend but feel like a social invalid. Which, in most cases, I’m perfectly fine with. But sometimes nothing cures the soul like a Friday-Saturday bender.
Some of the best nights in college were spent going out on a weekday. I knew every special at every bar and would be the champion of the hangover rally. Now, sitting in my cubicle hungover chugging Powerade while staring at Excel all day is a fate worse than death. Ever have those days you go out for dinner, have a few drinks and feel that tingle of the weekday drinking animal roar from somewhere long since locked away?
I was supposed to play golf today with a friend of mine who is a local deputy in the sheriff’s department. I was excited all week until he had to cancel at the last minute due to having to appear in court for busting some guy on meth that tried to attack him. It is no fault of his, but I was excited to see my friend and not just the people I work with. Later that day, my little brother from my fraternity days cancelled our lunch due to one of his employees not showing up. Scheduling anything and not having life interrupt is a minor miracle.
Four years ago when I graduated college, we all promised to stay in touch and call often. For the first six months, there were plenty of drunken calls, group texts, visits, etc. But as life got real, people got jobs and friends moved away, so staying in contact with some of my friends became difficult. When we would see each other, it’d be like time never passed. We’ve been through break-ups, pregnancy scares, proposals, big brother nights, fist fights, and hell-and-high-water together only to see distance and real life get in the way.
I make an effort to call all of my close friends, those that would be considered for being groomsmen, at least once a month. It’s strange how much change can happen in between calls. Sometimes I’ll drunk text them from our favorite bar since I still live in our college town and we’ll reminisce about sneaking out tallboys for the walk home.
As my esteemed friend pointed out, keeping up with old friends, forging new friendships, and making one’s way through life is all part of the adventure. It is important to never forget where you came from, how you got there and with whom you took the adventure. Mark Twain once said, “Don’t let schooling interfere with your education.” Well, I say don’t let being an adult interfere with your friendships. People come, people go, some grow young, some grow cold. .
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