There’s A McDonald’s Secret Menu, And Everything About It Is Depressing

People love a secret menu. It’s a great way to feel like an insider, even though feeling like an insider at a place like, oh, I dunno, McDonald’s is kind of sad.

Well, food hipsters are rejoicing today, as word got out that noted fast food juggernaut McDonald’s has a secret menu. Kind of. Thanks to a hard hitting Reddit AMA with a McDonald’s store manager, the Internet is ablaze with off-menu items being ordered across the globe.

There's A McDonald's Secret Menu, And Everything About It Is Depressing

I’ll just go ahead and go on record and state that ordering an off-menu item at McDonald’s is close to rock bottom. I don’t have an axe to grind here, they’re serving billions every day from what I understand, but there’s just something inherently try-hard about getting cute with your order. Full disclosure, though, I’m a Whataburger loyalist, and The Hulk is one of, if not the, greatest off-menu item of all time.

I can now confirm that there is, in fact, an off menu item called The Hulk. #chickenstrip #health

A photo posted by David Ruff (@dcruff) on

Yep, that’s a chicken strip beautifully placed in a bacon and egg taquito. You’re welcome, guys. For those of you wondering what highly suspect McDonald’s secret menu items are being outed today, take a look at your own risk:

“Mc10:35,” or as I call it, the McBonerKiller

“Monster Mac” and “McCrepe” (McCrap)

“McGangBang” otherwise known as, McTryHard

I give you the McGangBang: A McChicken sandwiched between a McDouble because this is America. #SecretMenu @McDonalds #Shhhhh

A photo posted by Jeanette Settembre (@j_settembre) on

“The Land, Air And Sea” more like the “Land, Air and C”

There you go. I’m sure you all can’t wait to head down to your local McDonald’s to have the poor SOB working the register look at you like a moron when you ask for a McGangBang. Eat responsibly.

Image via Vytautas Kielaitis /

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Lawyer. Writer. Dude doing business. I'm the meatloaf guy from tv.

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