======= ======= ====== ====== ====== ===== ==== ====== ====== ===== ==== ======= ======= ====== ====== ====== ===== ==== ====== ====== ===== ====
I am one of the few people I know who don’t complain about people posting pictures of their weddings and kids on social media. I mean, I can understand a few reasons why women care more than men… my biological clock is not ticking. But as I glance at the pictures of my college friends who either dated through college and got married young or are just starting to get married and have kids, I noticed something among them all. They look happy. Sure, Facebook is for posting all of a family’s happy moments, but hell, it looks appealing. Granted, most are past the point of diapers and scream crying (at least from the child), but they all look like an overly happy stock photo family.
I’m sure my change in attitude towards kids, the little brats I’ve traditionally found annoying, is a result of entering my thirties. You start thinking of your legacy. Your parents’ legacy. Whether you want to be the lone parent in his or her forties at elementary school PTA meetings. Worst of all, you start thinking of how you’re going to explain to your family at Thanksgiving that while you aren’t seriously dating anyone you’ve been out galavanting over the past year with nobody really sticking. Well, at least not figuratively.
On the one hand, it could be worse. I could be ten years older, single, and sliding into the Twitter DMs of 18-year-olds. That is, if Twitter doesn’t go bankrupt before then. On the other hand, I truly do want to get my shit together. Don’t get me wrong, playing the field is fun, and that’s where the internal conflict lies. Most field-playing involves someone in their mid-twenties or younger. You’re nearing a deadline. They aren’t. They have all the time in the world. Most people in their twenties who are married understood my sentiment long ago, but to those of us still single, this is where the struggle lies.
There are more problems with the transition of mindset. You are still clinging to your ideal standards in a person. Looks. Career. Personality. Chemistry. What stage of life they are in. And, if you’re in a very competitive crowd, how he or she stacks up to everyone else’s significant other (women, don’t even pretend you are above this). You have to cling to those expectations while opening up your mind to something new. When you are younger, you have the time to have the attitude of ‘if he or she doesn’t meet most if not all my requirements, I guess I can still sleep with them—I just won’t marry them.’ I know this sounds like the worst kind of person’s attitude towards casual flings or dating, but we’re all guilty of it in one way or another. But as you start to transition over to wanting a family, you wonder if you have to compromise on a few of your less important requirements. If you’re really lucky, you won’t.
My conclusion in regards to this transition in attitude I’m experiencing is that I’m old. I’m getting too freaking old. I can’t guarantee there won’t be more ships passing in the night between now and my next birthday, but there will always be the subconscious question of, “What happens tomorrow?” .
Image via YouTube
Respond
@5OClockShadow_
As a walking contradiction myself I can understand the dichotomy here, even if I can’t relate to it. I’m kind of on the other end. I’m in my mid 20s, and my response to the serious thoughts of finding a ride or die I’ve had, cooing over baby photos, and crying at weddings has been to lose 50lbs and attempt to sleep with as many people as I’m comfortable with
I wish you had a twitter, Shambles.
Oh I do. It’s full of bad opinions and retweets of bad opinions. My insta is fire tho
$85/hr provide by Google, I am making a good salary from home $6580-$7065/week , which is amazing, under a year agoo I was jobless in a horrible economyy. I thank God every day I was blessed with these instructions and now it’s my duty to pay it forward and share it with Everyone,
Here is I started,,,,,,,, http://www.CareerToday00.Tk
If you would have posted this on a Sunday night or Monday morning it would have forced me into a full on anxiety attack.
It’s attitudes like this why the divorce rate is so high. You don’t need to settle with someone just to be with someone.
Never settle. Ever.
But always look to expand your horizons?
“I’m not as good as I once was, but I’m as good once as I ever was”
-Tim McGraw
-Michael Scarn
-Toby Keith
As a guy who just turned 24 and was worrying about settling down, you just calmed my nerves. I know it wasn’t the intent of your article, but thanks nonetheless. 6 more years!
Unrelated to the article, but every time I see 5OClockShadow’s name on something my brain reads “50 O’Clock” instead and I chuckle every time at that mental picture.
I’ve honestly been thinking at what point do I decide to have a child alone (which is hard and I don’t really want to do). I still have a decent dating life, and I know that would shut it down. But I don’t want to wait too long. Scaries triggered.
Sup?
This is kind of a weird sup. But if you’re single, Catholic, 27-32 and not a douchebag, let’s go make a baby.
I didn’t really care for the innuendo used in the title at all.
Name checks out.
Comparing your life to someones Facebook profile is like comparing your behind the scenes footage to their highlight reel. However, you’re right. I’m torn between wanting to hookup and wanting to settle down and it definitely causes some contradicting feelings.