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On The DadGum Podcast (now live on Grandex Labs), Pete and I did some chatting about this weekend’s opening of The Incredibles 2. This led us into some general Pixar talk, seeing as they’re the GOAT when it comes to children’s movies. Listen here.
While their movies are for kids, a lot of them have deep adult themes and can be sad as hell. If you’ve seen almost any Pixar movie, besides maybe the original Incredibles, you’ve probably seen something incredibly sad. With apologies to Wall-E, here are the five saddest Pixar movie moments.
5. Bing Bong Dies (Inside Out)
The first and hopefully last time I cry after a dude named “Bing Bong” dies, but my God this walloped my heart. This whole movie is deep as hell and made me cry in multiple spots, but this part really takes the cake:
“Take her to the moon for me.”
4. Almost The Entirety Of Toy Story 3 (Toy Story 3)
This film was a bigger factory of sadness than FirstEnergy Stadium in Cleveland. If this movie didn’t make you tear up multiple times, you don’t have a soul. Don’t remember all the sadness? That’s okay, it’s a lot to remember. Like the time Andy’s eternally devoted toys thought he’d thrown them away.
Not that sad? How about the story about three toys venturing through hell to get back to their owner, only finding out they’ve been replaced:
Oh wait, there’s also the scene where our main characters, these toys who by this point we’ve spent nearly six hours with, all come to grips with the fact that THEY’RE ABOUT TO BE BURNED ALIVE. This YouTube video is titled “The Furnace,” for God’s sake.
Or how about simply when Andy says goodbye to all his toys? The perfect tear-jerker metaphor for growing up and moving on.
Woody saying “So long, partner” annihilates every shred of emotion in my body.
3. The Opening Of Up (Up)
It takes four minutes for us as a viewer to fall in love with this precious couple, then be tragically dragged into a pit of sadness.
A first hint of sadness arrives watching expectant parents Ellie and Carl paint a nursery, then weep at the hospital after a miscarriage. The final kicker comes when you watch little old Carl lose his partner in life and sit alone after her funeral. Time is a cruel thing, and we all die sometimes. It’s just unfortunate when that fact punches you right in the dick four minutes into a children’s movie.
2. The Opening Of Finding Nemo (Finding Nemo)
Oh, here’s a cute young expecting couple discussing naming their children and OH HEY IT’S A MASS HOMICIDE OF THE MOTHER AND HUNDREDS OF HER UNBORN KIDS.
To my knowledge, this is the only Disney-related movie that opens with multiple murders. Watching poor Marlin go from happy husband and expectant father to cradling his one remaining physically damaged child, sobbing and naming it per his late wife’s wishes is something that my soul hasn’t recovered from.
1. Jessie Gets Donated (Toy Story 2)
Nope. Nope nope nope. Absolutely not. Something this heart-wrenching should’ve never been in a children’s movie. You know it; and if you don’t, save yourself by not watching this.
As the father of a child who’s watched Toy Story 2 at least a hundred times, I haven’t gotten any less emotionally destroyed by this scene of abandonment through each viewing. The concept of how much these toys love and are devoted to their owners means occurrences like this happen daily in the Toy Story universe, which makes it all the more terrible.
The saddest part, aside from the perfectly sad Sarah McLachlan vocals, is watching Jessie snuggle up to the person she loves the most after all these years, thinking they’ve finally been reunited. Then as abruptly as she was pulled from under the bed, she’s left in a box on the side of the road, unexpectedly abandoned, and sending us into a tailspin of tears. Go to Hell, Pixar. .